Best ASOBAP Podcasts (2025)

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S5E19 - Kill Darkstar 1:30:29

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20d ago1:30:29

1:30:29

Cersei is plotting, Doran is plotting, the Sand Snakes are hissing and the Watcher is watching. Meanwhile, back at the Wall Jon is doing everything he can to make as many enemies as possible while alienating his remaining friends. This can only go well! I say "Oberon" instead of "Oberyn" a million times in this episode for some reason. So close! Th…

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S5E18 - Woman Cake (That Rainer Can't Have) 1:40:08

2M ago1:40:08

1:40:08

How many women does the Feminist fuck? A thousand women, and one. (somberly) the one women is Roose Bolton's wife Chapters: ADWD Daenerys VI, The Prince of Winterfell Outro music: Sober to Death by Car Seat Headrest

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S5E17 - The Holes of Hardon Tower 1:30:07

4M ago1:30:07

1:30:07

Just like Bran in this chapter, we take a glimpse into the past... into the distant year of 2024, when "Hawk Tuah" was all the rage. Jon is also here and uhhh, well let's just say, he really fucked up this time. That's right, he introduced heterosexuality to the Night's Watch boys. If you ask me, he really deserves to die for this. But hey, that's …

1
S5E16 - ASOBAPBBQ 1:50:43

7M ago1:50:43

1:50:43

Kay edited this one so I have no idea what the title means nor do I have any memory recording it. Here's what Kay says about it: "the episode is called ASOBAPBBQ. it's about theon hears some very cool stories from roose and tyrion hangs out on a boat. the song is will anybody ever love me" Chapters: ADWD Reek III, Tyrion VIII Outro music: Will Anyb…

1
S5E15 - One Demon Sized Sperm 1:54:29

8M ago1:54:29

1:54:29

We're back once again talking about the greatest literary character of all time. That's right, it's a Melisandre chapter! Dany is also here and I'm gonna be honest I already forgot what happened in her chapter. Let's say she had a talk with Skahaz and Mo Reznak and cried about Missandei's dead brother. Oh and she has child slaves now, but in a cool…

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S5E14 - Pussy Fetus Magic 1:56:07

11M ago1:56:07

1:56:07

a new episode!!! this one is called "Pussy Fetus Magic". it's the jon chapter where melisandre touches his "wolf" and davos turns out to be alive and gets his boyfinding mission. the song is char ga kuru by koichiro hori

1
S5E13 - Dance, Forrest! Sing! 2:05:15

1y ago2:05:15

2:05:15

I swear there was at least 10 additional minutes of Forrest Gump talk that I cut out. Somebody get us theatre tickets we're getting desperate. Chapters: ADWD The Wayward Bride, Tyrion VII Outro music: Gump by Weird Al Yankovic

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S5E12 - Gloryhole for Jacking Off 1:59:06

1y ago1:59:06

1:59:06

Welcome back to your favorite podcast about the Performing Arts. Theater, opera, musical, we got it all covered! This week we brush up on some of the important theater terms, and then we meet a whole lot of guys. Who did JonCon fuck in the Golden Company? And what are all the sellsword companies like? Are they normal? The answers may surprise you! …

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S5E11 - Tywin's Taint 2:10:57

1y ago2:10:57

2:10:57

We are all still grieving the death of many of our favorite characters such as Missandei's brother as well as Dany's favorite harp player, but at the end of the day we must move on and continue with the podcast. This is an episode where Tyrion does the worst thing he's ever done and he's still not the character we hate most. Then, we argue why Dany…

1
S5E10 - One Ball 1:55:29

1+ y ago1:55:29

1:55:29

This New Theon Greyjoy Theory Will Blow Your Mind! Chapters: ADWD Reek II, Jon V Outro music: Redesigned a Million Times by And So I Watch You from Afar ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S5E9 - Giant Woman Ogre Spit 1:50:49

1+ y ago1:50:49

1:50:49

Hey everyone George is doing a play in London about the tourney at Harrenhal and we want to get free press tickets to the premiere so we need to be taken seriously. Hold on let me just see what I named this episode Chapters: ADWD Tyrion V, Davos III Outro music: When I Get to the Border by Richard & Linda Thompson ASOBAP is brought to you by Good E…

1
S5E8 - I Like Your Out Tit 1:54:25

1+ y ago1:54:25

1:54:25

Stop me if you heard this before but we're reading Dany and Jon chapters this week. Dany sees a sex show with a gay man and then Jon looks at some meat slabs with a different gay man. George is once again hitting us with the parallels across different chapters, and in this case the parallel is "gay men". Let's give it up to the gay men, everyone! C…

1
S5E7 - Piss Quips 1:48:02

1+ y ago1:48:02

1:48:02

Tyrion gets horny, plays chess and does a cartwheel. Davos eats a nasty apple. Plus: everything you always wanted to know about urinal etiquette! Chapters: ADWD Tyrion IV, Davos II Outro music: Pissin' In The Wind by Jerry Jeff Walker ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2…

1
S5E6 - Jigsaw's Woke 1:25:48

1+ y ago1:25:48

1:25:48

A stinky boy AND a baby boy? George, you're spoiling us! Chapters: ADWD Reek I, Bran II Outro music: I'm Your Man by Mitski ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S5E5 - Would Jeremy Betray Me? 1:54:16

1+ y ago1:54:16

1:54:16

The two main characters of this book are very bad at politics. That's themes, probably. We discuss some of the terrible decisions Jon makes, and then imagine a reality where the Dany chapters are good. Tune in next time to find out who "Reek" is. Chapters: ADWD Jon III, Daenerys II Outro music: Dire Wolf by Grateful Dead ASOBAP is brought to you by…

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S5E4 - Black Widow for Dads 1:54:02

1+ y ago1:54:02

1:54:02

Chapters: ADWD Tyrion III and Davos I Kay was cursed by the Red God of Covid (19) and lost the audio for the last episode, but luckily we're back to give you a super quick run down of what happened! Maybe these episodes could be shorter?? Anyway, here's Tyrion. Outro music: "Play the Hero" by NAOKI ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productio…

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S5E3 - Simping Explained 1:33:08

2y ago1:33:08

1:33:08

We find some SHOCKING new revelations about when The Winds of Winter is going to be released. Then we check back in with our favorite boy who isn't eating anyone and Tyrion is also here. Chapters: ADWD Bran I, Tyrion II Outro music: Cannibal's Hymn by Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: …

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S5E2 - Naruto Is Real and He Fucked My Wife 2 2:20:11

2y ago2:20:11

2:20:11

Chaz is our friend and she doesn't deserve the bullying she gets from certain cohosts who definitely isn't me Chapters: ADWD Daenerys I, Jon I Outro music: Bad Sneakers by Steely Dan ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S5E1 - Hands Job 2:32:39

2y ago2:32:39

2:32:39

Tyrion drinks but does not know things. Plus: an epic guy. It's time we begin the dance Chapters: ADWD Prologue, Tyrion I Outro music: Change in the Weather by The Beths ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S4E24 - 4th Annual "Nimble Dick Memorial" ASOBAP Awards Show and A Feast for Crows Retrospective 1:45:46

2y ago1:45:46

1:45:46

You know what it is. Respect Dick, Outro music: Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S4E23 - The Dad That Stepped Up 2:38:07

2y ago2:38:07

2:38:07

Haters said it can't be done - we finished A Feast for Crows! Chapters: AFFC Jaime VII, Samwell V Outro music: King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard - Mr. Beat ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

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S4E22 - Put a Whole Lightbulb in Your Mouth 2:37:34

2+ y ago2:37:34

2:37:34

we're all trying to find the younger, more beautiful queen who did this Chapters: AFFC Brienne VIII, Cersei X Outro music: Mitski - I Bet on Losing Dogs ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S4E21 - What If Thighs Had Nipples 2:36:08

2+ y ago2:36:08

2:36:08

Chaos is a ladder, Alayne. Chapters: AFFC The Princess in the Tower, Alayne (from Seinfeld) II Outro music: Iron Horse - Ocean Breathes Salty ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S4E20 - Step One: Fill Your Bathtub with Bleach 3:00:28

2+ y ago3:00:28

3:00:28

Time to check back in once again with the Lannister siblings, where everything seems perfectly normal! No real singers were harmed in the recording of this episode. Chapters: AFFC Jaime VI, Cersei IX Outro music: Warren Zevon - Poor Poor Pitiful Me ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2…

1
S4E19 - Cum's Landing 2:42:27

2+ y ago2:42:27

2:42:27

We learn about a new sport. Brienne learns about a new boy. Cersei learns nothing. Chapters: AFFC Cersei VIII, Brienne VII Outro music: Bends by Carly Rae Jepsen ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S4E18 - Ah! Circlusion! I like it 3:05:08

2+ y ago3:05:08

3:05:08

Sam is well. Chapters: AFFC Cat of the Canals, Samwell IV Outro music: My Body Betrayed Me by Black Wing ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S4E17 - Trumbeak, Leafeon, Jellicent, Scatterbug, Pupitar 1:56:27

2+ y ago1:56:27

1:56:27

Every single technological problem happened during the recording of this episode, but nevertheless we persisted. Cersei is no longer winning even in her mind, and Jaime finally has a good time. Plus: a behind the scenes revelation that changes EVERYTHING. Chapters: AFFC Cersei VII, Jaime V Outro music: Alice Cooper - Feed My Frankenstein ASOBAP is …

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S4E16 - Chaz's Jelly 3:05:47

2+ y ago3:05:47

3:05:47

This episode is coming to you from a distant past where there was much uncertainty whether Hot D will be good or not. Maybe it would be bad! There was simply no way of knowing. In this week's chapters, Jaime is on his redemption arc bullshit and Brienne is on an island. But watch out! There might be a mystery to solve! Chapters: AFFC Jaime IV, Brie…

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S4E15 - He's a 10 But He Can't Juggle 2:41:59

3y ago2:41:59

2:41:59

The biggest brains in podcasting return to talk about the biggest brains in Westeros. Chapters: AFFC Cersei VI, The Reaver Outro music: Moby Dick by Jakey ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

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S4E14 - EPISODE 100: The Season of MPREG 2:34:14

3y ago2:34:14

2:34:14

No offense but y'all listened to one hundred of these? God bless. Chapters: AFFC Samwell III, Jaime III Outro music: This Ain't The Summer of Love by Blue Öyster Cult ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S4E13 - Tyrion-Posing 3:11:21

3y ago3:11:21

3:11:21

The beginning of what historians will deem "the ASOBAP MPREG era". Chapters: AFFC Cersei V, Brienne V Outro music: These Boots Are Made for Walking by Nancy Sinatra ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S4E12 - Trampolines Are Defiance Against God 2:22:17

3y ago2:22:17

2:22:17

The numbers don't lie: 100% of the emo boys on this podcast are bisexual. This week, we ponder what it would be like to go back to the ocean like Kevin Costner, wonder what it's like to grow gills like Kevin Costner did and what Kevin Costner would say about this Arya chapter. Then we check back in with Alayne from Seinfeld. What's the deal with Ly…

1
S4E11 - Believe Dick 2:18:28

3y ago2:18:28

2:18:28

We lose some of our favorite guys as Brienne does an epic murder and Arianne's failsafe plan goes wrong against all odds. Chapters: AFFC Brienne IV, The Queenmaker Outro music: Ween - Waving My Dick in the Wind ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2…

1
S4E10 - The Cumtown of ASOIAF 2:48:22

3y ago2:48:22

2:48:22

It's Kingsmoot time! And who has a better story than Euron Crow's Eye? Chapters: AFFC The Iron Captain, The Drowned Man Outro music: Illés - Te kit választanál? ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S4E8 - Respect the Boob Ghost 2:16:37

3y ago2:16:37

2:16:37

Do you think Stannis will come back as the (K)night King or did you like season 8 of Game of Thrones? In this episode we meet some new types of guys and create our own original character (do NOT steal) (but feel free to send us fan art). Chapters: AFFC Brienne III, Samwell II Outro music: Big Sky by The Kinks ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episod…

1
S4E7 - Soil Deez Nuts 2:04:32

3y ago2:04:32

2:04:32

This episode is all about big nipples. Take it up with George! Chapters: AFFC Cersei III, The Soiled Knight Outro music: Body by Megan Thee Stallion ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2

1
S4E6 - Like a Seahorse 2:00:35

3y ago2:00:35

2:00:35

We check in on how Sansa, or as she's now known, Elaine from Seinfeld is doing, and then we go over to the Iron Islands to see a guy who's epic for reading! I sure remember this episode that was recorded two months ago. Chapters: AFFC Sansa I, The Kraken's Daughter Outro music: Untitled (cont.) by The Brave Little Abacus ASOBAP is brought to you by…

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S4E5 - She Wag My Staff Until I Humfrey 2:40:12

3+ y ago2:40:12

2:40:12

Jaime hasn't slept for a few days, and we ALL know what happens when you do that: he starts imagining other men's bodies. Brienne finds a little boy. Chapters: AFFC Jaime I, Brienne II Outro music: Who Needs Sleep? by Barenaked Ladies ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2…

1
S4E4 - L+Ratio+You Fucked Your Brother 2:29:27

3+ y ago2:29:27

2:29:27

Welcome back to the Cersei show! Believe it or not, she is still winning. This week, she's still very normal about Margaery and then she meets a sexual woman. We're so excited for her! But before that, we take a trip to Braavos to find out what Arya does to that worm. Chapters: AFFC Arya I, Cersei II Outro music: The Hearse Song by Rusty Cage ASOBA…

1
S4E3 - Little Bone Boy Sitting in Lincoln's Lap 2:36:50

3+ y ago2:36:50

2:36:50

Brienne meets many types of guys. Sam reads and Randyll Tarly is canceled again. Are you Team Antz or Team A Bug's Life? Chapters: AFFC Brienne I, Samwell I Outro music: Naruto Shippuden OST - Hyakkaryouran ASOBAP is brought to you by Good Episode Productions. Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/w8APyXe2a2…

1
S4E2 - I Would Fuck All Women 2:13:32

3+ y ago2:13:32

2:13:32

The woman respecters have logged on. Chapters: AFFC: The Captain of the Guards, Cersei I Outro music: Maria by Scooter

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S4E1 - George Invented Feet 2:55:59

3+ y ago2:55:59

2:55:59

We are kicking off A Feast for Crows season the only way we can: by talking about feet. Chapters: AFFC Prologue, The Prophet Outro music: Feet Don't Fail Me Now by Joy Crooks

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S3E38 - 3rd Annual ASOBAP "Yummy Scrummy Memorial" Awards Sponsored by Kelianne Stankus (feat. Petyr "Littlefinger" Baelish) 1:46:51

3+ y ago1:46:51

1:46:51

We might have coaxed ourselves into a snafu.

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S3E37 - Entering a New Phase 2:46:59

3+ y ago2:46:59

2:46:59

The third book in the series was the longest book of the series. Chapters: ASOS Sansa VII, Epilogue Outro music: Tom Waits - Dead and Lovely

1
S3E36 - It's Me to Me 1:23:00

3+ y ago1:23:00

1:23:00

We're getting a little twisted with this one. Sam steals an election while Jon has gay thoughts. Chapters: ASOS Samwell V, Jon XII Outro music: Belle and Sebastian - Wrapped Up in Books

1
S3E35 - She Slurp on My Yoshi! Wahoo! 2:15:15

3+ y ago2:15:15

2:15:15

One of the POVs this week gains a new dad, the other kills one. Equivalent exchange. Chapters: ASOS Jon XI, Tyrion XI Outro music: Winter's House by Giles Corey

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S3E34 - New Cowboy: Cole Cassidy 2:18:57

3+ y ago2:18:57

2:18:57

New cowboy dropped. Chapters: ASOS Arya VIII, Samwell IV Outro music: Let's All Help the Cowboys (Sing the Blues) by Waylon Jennings

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S3E33 - BrieNFT 2:24:53

3+ y ago2:24:53

2:24:53

We are very excited to announce that ASOBAP is jumping on the hype: we are selling you JPEGs of Brienne for ten million dollars worth of fake crypto money each! This is not a scam! Other suggested talking points: a sword to kill Sansa, how fun it is to use hot wax, getting a castle where 9/11 happened, fisting a horn and the dichotomy between being…

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S3E32 - We're Not Afraid of Geodude 2:52:58

3+ y ago2:52:58

2:52:58

Geodude is NOT scary he's just weird! Other discussion points include: what if snakes had arms, pointing and laughing at Jorah one last time and, idk, some fight between Gregor and Oberyn I guess? Yeah, nothing important happens in these chapters. Chapters: ASOS Tyrion X, Daenerys VI Outro music: Matt Elliott - Guidance is Internal…

1
S3E31 - Shansha 2:05:31

3+ y ago2:05:31

2:05:31

What's the most fucked up way you can eat fruit? Chapters: ASOS Sansa VI, Jon IX Outro music: The Wiggles - Fruit Salad