Best Jessica Partnow Podcasts (2025)

1
Ep 54: Are Het Relationships Hopeless? 1:20:50

8h ago1:20:50

1:20:50

Sarah and Alex unpack the mournful refrain: “if only I was into girls,” and question whether modern relationships between men and women are fundamentally doomed. Mentioned in the episode: The Tragedy of Heterosexuality by Jane Ward | Midsommar (film) | The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood | If Hetero Relationships Are So Bad, Why Do Women Go Back…

1
Ep 53: Good Grief with Queer Chaplain Kam 1:12:17

21d ago1:12:17

1:12:17

How does death, loss and grief impact our relationships? After a year filled with loss, Sarah and Alex talk to a trauma-informed spiritual care provider about the taboos around death, and what happens to our desire when people around us die. Mentioned in the episode: Close to the Knives: A Memoir of Disintegration by David Wojnarowicz | Without: Po…

1
Ep 52: How (Not to) Break up 1:15:55

1M ago1:15:55

1:15:55

Is it you? Is it me? Are you moving to Antarctica?? In this episode we talk about how and how not to end a relationship. Mentioned in the episode: @karamintheworld on Instagram [email protected] | https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ Logo design by roy franklin: www.whateverfactory.org

1
Ep 51: Love in a F*cked Up World with Dean Spade 1:13:54

2M ago1:13:54

1:13:54

Are the same dynamics screwing up our relationships also hampering our social movements? Sarah and Alex talk to activist and law professor Dean Spade about the romance myth, capitalism and love in this f*cked up world. Mentioned in the episode: Love in a F*cked Up World | DeanSpade.net | The Death Panel | Movement Memos Also by Dean Spade: Mutual A…

1
Ep 50: Romance and Polyamory (Encore) 1:18:05

3M ago1:18:05

1:18:05

Encore episode Romance: what does it mean?? Sarah, Alex and Jess talk about their favorite romantic movies on the hottest day of the year. And finally answer the question: what IS romance? Or, do they just come up with 5,000 new questions? Listen to the end to find out! This episode first aired in August 2024. Mentioned in the episode: Say Anything…

1
Ep 49: Dating Across Race with Ramsey 1:20:14

3M ago1:20:14

1:20:14

Last episode we started to talk about race in dating, and tbh…mistakes were made. So this episode we’re doubling down! Ramsey shares his experience dating as a Black polyamorous man in Seattle, offers advice for white people dating other races, and asks us “taboo” questions about our own experiences. Mentioned in the episode: Pacific Northwest BIPO…

1
Ep 48: BONUS episode: Why you need a dating strategy with Reagan Jackson 29:29

4M ago29:29

29:29

We had such an interesting side conversation with Reagan about her experience working with a dating coach that we had to make a bonus episode all about it. Mentioned in the episode: Still True Reagan Jackson Anwar White, Dating and Relationship Coach Get Your Guy Podcast with Anwar White [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakesca…

1
Ep 47: The Monogamous Skeptic Returns! Special Guest Reagan Jackson 1:37:03

4M ago1:37:03

1:37:03

Sarah and Alex's skeptical monogamous friend Reagan Jackson is back to grill them about sex, jealousy, and whether they’re just dating other versions of each other over and over. Mentioned in the episode: Still True Reagan Jackson Sarah’s interview in Psychology Today: Societal Implications of Consensual Non-Monogamy The Will to Change: Men, Mascul…

1
Ep 46: Swinging and Sex Parties 1:11:13

5M ago1:11:13

1:11:13

Lissa joins the podcast to help us parse out the difference between polyamory and swinging. And Alex opens up about his not-so-hot sex party experience. Mentioned in the episode: https://seattle-inclusive-matchmaking.square.site/ Reach out to Lissa: [email protected] [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ Logo des…

1
Ep 45: How much should you tell your partners? 1:11:19

6M ago1:11:19

1:11:19

TMI time! Sarah and Alex work on healthy habits for disclosing info about sex and feelings in their other relationships. What’s an overshare? When is it hiding or deception? And what is the nature of truth anyway? Mentioned in the episode: More: A Memoir of Open Marriage by Molly Rodden Winter Disclosure (Michael Crichton) [email protected] * …

1
Ep 44: Fascism and Feelings 1:01:49

6M ago1:01:49

1:01:49

Sarah and Alex make sense of the election results by talking about developmental stages, anti-social behavior, and oh yeah and also polyamory. Mentioned in the episode: Voting patterns by income Thoughts vs Feelings Polywise Polysecure More about Kegan and “The Evolving Self” Winnicott on the Psychology of Democracy More about Winnicott (and the id…

1
Ep 43: Conflict and how to fight better - Season 4 Premiere! 1:25:44

7M ago1:25:44

1:25:44

Welcome to season 4 of Mistakes Were Made! Today we're asking: How much conflict should you expect in a healthy relationship? In this episode Sarah, Jessica and Alex explore how to fight better (rather than avoiding fights altogether) by understanding our internal patterns and reaction styles. Logo design by Roy Franklin: http://whateverfactory.org…

1
Ep 42: Season 3 FINALE - Poly Etiquette 1:20:35

9M ago1:20:35

1:20:35

Which fork should you use on a first polyamorous date? Do you have to let your partner be the little spoon all the time? We pondered these and other burning questions in the Finale episode of Season Three. Srsly though, here's the etiquette and advice we gathered for this episode, if you don't want to listen to 80 mins of our charming banter: Let y…

1
Ep 41: Romance and Polyamory 1:18:02

10M ago1:18:02

1:18:02

Romance: what does it mean?? Sarah, Alex and Jess talk about their favorite romantic movies on the hottest day of the year. And finally answer the question: what IS romance? Or, do they just come up with 5,000 new questions? Listen to the end to find out! Mentioned in the episode: Say Anything (Cameron Crowe, 1989) The Graduate (Mike Nichols, 1967)…

1
Ep 40: Gen Poly with Mattise Wood 1:18:14

10M ago1:18:14

1:18:14

Are the youngs living in queer poly utopia or what? Sarah and Alex recruit their 20 something barista, Mattise Wood, to find out. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ Logo design by eroyn franklin: www.whateverfactory.org

1
Ep 39: Polyamory Pitfalls - LIVE Episode! 54:00

11M ago54:00

54:00

Special live episode featuring some of our favorite mistakes. Recorded May 9, 2024 in Seattle, WA. Check out the slides from the live episode: https://www.mentimeter.com/app/presentation/n/alkskyvkpq54ehb844w3r2oejcjo4d6a/present Evergreen hearts on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EvergreenHeartsOrg Brand new logo by eroyn franklin! www.whatever…

1
Ep 38: Relationship Anarchy with Maxx Hill 1:11:00

11M ago1:11:00

1:11:00

We finally get to learn about relationship anarchy. Hope you're hungry for a smorgasbord! Maxx Hill, curator of the Relationship Anarchy Smorgasbord, joins to talk about the infinite possibilities of how you can "customize your commitments" when you let go of societal expectations. Open the link and follow along! Mentioned in the episode: Relations…

1
Ep 37: Poly-tics 1:13:11

1y ago1:13:11

1:13:11

Mentioned in the episode: The Atlantic - Polyamory, the Ruling Class’s Latest Fad Time Magazine - Polyamory isn’t just for liberals: The Surprising Political Evolution of American Polyamory More: A Memoir of Open Marriage Stranger in a Strange Land Brand new logo by eroyn franklin! www.whateverfactory.org [email protected] * https://www.instag…

1
Ep 36: Owning Your Desire - Encore Episode 1:20:16

1y ago1:20:16

1:20:16

Encore episode! Let’s talk about sex (or die trying)! Sarah and Alex finally attempt to actually discuss sexual dynamics in non-monogamy without laughing or crying. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ An actually useful explanation of how to play the three minute game (since ours went so sideways): https://www.youtube.c…

1
Ep 35: Coming Out To Your Community 1:16:16

1y ago1:16:16

1:16:16

Who should you tell you're poly??? A death in the family sparks different reactions from Alex and Sarah about how open to be with family and friends. Mentioned in the episode: Evergreen Hearts - Polyamory Pitfalls - Thursday May 9th, 6:30pm The Cut: 5 people tell their coming out stories Business Insider: Coming out as poly is the hardest kind of c…

1
Ep 34: Performance Anxiety 1:18:41

1y ago1:18:41

1:18:41

Alex wants to talk about performance anxiety….and Sarah really, really doesn’t. Mentioned in the episode: Evergreen Hearts - Polyamory Pitfalls - Thursday May 9th, 6:30pm Cleveland Clinic: Erectile Dysfunction Book: The Ice Storm, by Rick Moody Hump! 2024 National Tour Dates Book: Come as You Are, by Emily Nagoski "5 things you can say to someone w…

1
Ep 33: Solo Poly Showdown with Rozie and Tyson 1:24:23

1y ago1:24:23

1:24:23

Two local organizers talk about their experiences being solo poly; what they like about it, the challenges, independence, couples privilege and more. Stay tuned for the lightning round! Mentioned in the episode: Puget Sound Polyamory Meetup Group Evergreen Hearts Poly Prom Newcomers Social Connections Speed Dating Puget Sound Polyamory The NY Times…

1
Ep 32: How Men Can Date Better with Dr. Eric FitzMedrud 1:32:50

1+ y ago1:32:50

1:32:50

Our guest is "Manthropologist" Dr Eric FitzMedrud (okay, we made that title up, he doesn't really call himself that). We asked Dr FitzMedrud to decode Sarah and Jessica's bad dates with men, using tools from his book The Better Man: A Guide to Consent, Stronger Relationships, and Hotter Sex. Dr FitzMedrud, who is poly and bi, takes a compassionate …

1
Ep 31: Bonus episode: The Gentrification of Polyamory 1:12:10

1+ y ago1:12:10

1:12:10

Special Midnight Mini episode: Polyamory seems to have suddenly gone mainstream, with the New Yorker and New York Magazine running cover stories in the last couple months. Sarah and Alex dig into the icky feelings that came up reading these stories, and realize that it might be about uncomfortable trends that implicate them. Mentioned in the episod…

1
Ep 30: Perfecting Your Dating App Profile with Riki Thompson 1:28:12

1+ y ago1:28:12

1:28:12

The leading researcher into poly dating app usage shares what works and what doesn’t in profiles, gives insights into the trends in non-traditional relationship styles around the country, and defines the dizzying jargon of poly subcultures. Listen until the end to find out what “dexting” means. Sign up for Riki Thompson's workshops and get a 20% di…

1
Ep 29: Are the Kids All Right? 1:22:49

1+ y ago1:22:49

1:22:49

Should non monogamous parents be “out” to their kids? In this episode Sarah and Alex ask different parents about their approaches to sharing their relationships with their children – from secrecy, to involving secondary partners in parenting – then share mistakes they've made in balancing their feelings and dating schedules with what was developmen…

1
Ep 28: Your Partner is on a Date... and You Panic 1:13:38

1+ y ago1:13:38

1:13:38

Sarah and Alex talk about the jealousy and panic that comes up when partners are on dates or trips with others, the roots of those feelings, and how rituals of connection and communication can help. Oh, and also how the film ET is a meta text for polyamory(?) Mentioned in the episode: https://www.reddit.com/r/nonmonogamy/s/2HFb3BywGM https://www.re…

1
Ep 27: Cowboys, Tourists and Triangulation 1:05:29

1+ y ago1:05:29

1:05:29

Alex’s partner leaves him for monogamy, sparking a conversation about cowboy-ing, triangulation and attachment. Mentioned in the episode: PolyPhilia: https://www.instagram.com/polyphiliablog/ Attachment Panic, the album by Alex & Sarah’s alt country band: https://open.spotify.com/album/2zrOxbFLVA4Y4L3m9Cjamq [email protected] * https://www.ins…

1
Ep 26: Outgrowing Non-Monogamy? 1:11:35

1+ y ago1:11:35

1:11:35

Is non-monogamy actually a sustainable lifestyle – or is it just an experiment? Sarah and Alex reflect on how the novelty of having an open marriage has worn off after three years. Reddit conversation re changes in non-monogamy styles over time [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/…

1
Ep 25: Polyamory Mythbusters 1:32:35

2y ago1:32:35

1:32:35

Season 2 finale! Sarah and Alex try to stump each other with research into some of the most common myths and misconceptions about non monogamy. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ More about us: Bloodstar band: https://ffm.to/bloodstarattachmentpanic | [Listen to Bloodstar on Spotify] Sarah’s website: https://www.sarahs…

1
Ep 24: Long Term Polyamory with Zack & Madeleine 1:22:17

2y ago1:22:17

1:22:17

Sarah and Alex talk with friends and ethical nonmonogamy role models Zack and Madeleine about maintaining a polyamorous partnership for the long haul, and making out with cute German guys. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/

1
Ep 23: Why We Lie 1:10:27

2y ago1:10:27

1:10:27

Sarah and Alex talk about the lies they have told each other…and themselves. Also, the patriarchy and whatnot. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ Mentioned in the episode: All about love, by bell hooks

1
Ep 22: Finding (Self) Love in Queer Non-Monogamy with Eli Goss 1:14:20

2y ago1:14:20

1:14:20

Sarah and Alex talk to Eli--a transmasc drag performer and progressive policy wonk--about Seattle drag, Texas BBQ, coming to non-monogamy during the pandemic and how to live our "Big Blob Best Lives." [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ More from Eli: https://www.instagram.com/sirloinseattle/ Mentioned in the episode: h…

1
Ep 21: Anti-Racist Polyamory with Kevin Patterson 55:55

2y ago55:55

55:55

We’re back! Sarah and Alex talk about race, representation, and the benefits of being the weird kid with author Kevin Patterson. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ More from Kevin Patterson: https://www.kevinapatterson.com/ https://unfuckyourpolyamory.com/ Love’s Not Color Blind by Kevin Patterson For Hire series by Ke…

1
Ep 20: Age Gaps & Gender Power Dynamics 1:31:33

2y ago1:31:33

1:31:33

Why do men tend to date younger women? Do all the same gender inequities play out in non-monogamy as in monogamy? Will Sarah and Alex finally figure out how to smash the patriarchy? Part one of a series about how inequities show up in non-monogamy (we think...) [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ Mentioned in the episod…

1
Ep 19: Desire 1:17:43

2y ago1:17:43

1:17:43

Let’s talk about sex (or die trying)! Sarah and Alex finally attempt to actually discuss sexual dynamics in non-monogamy without laughing or crying. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ An actually useful explanation of how to play the three minute game (since ours went so sideways): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_KCzp…

1
Ep 18: Threesomes, Thruples and Unicorn Hunting 1:24:51

2+ y ago1:24:51

1:24:51

Real life unicorn Cassidy joins the show to talk about the joys and complications of three way relationships, and the importance of L shaped couches. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/

1
Ep 17: Dating Apps for Non Monogamy 1:18:00

2+ y ago1:18:00

1:18:00

Meeting people – especially ENM/poly folks – is easier than ever thanks to dating apps. So why do we hate them so much? Sarah, Alex and Jessica swap embarrassing app stories, dig into the dirty secrets of the online dating industry, and give advice for successufl technology assisted non-monogamy. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/m…

1
Ep 16: Why don't you just stop? 1:12:04

2+ y ago1:12:04

1:12:04

When non-monogamous couples fight, going back to monogamy can feel like an easy solution. But Sarah and Alex discover that there’s a core conflict in their relationship that’s illuminated by dating others, but isn't caused by it. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/

1
Ep 15: Platonic Polyamory (And loving your friends) (ENCORE) 1:04:22

2+ y ago1:04:22

1:04:22

A weekend retreat with a friend reminds Sarah that non-monogamy isn't just about sex. Opening/closing quote from Kai Cheng Thom: https://kaichengthom.com/ Ban on co-living: https://www.kansascity.com/news/local/article260770552.html It's your friends who break your heart: https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2022/03/why-we-lose-friends-agin…

1
Ep 14: Ask A Sex Worker with Vaughn Wolff 1:04:19

2+ y ago1:04:19

1:04:19

How can sex workers help people exploring non-monogamy? Are all sex workers polyamorous? Is sex work inherently dangerous? Seattle Sex Worker Vaughn Wolff joins the podcast to talk about the intersections between sex work and polyamory, and answers all your burning questions. Find Vaughn at SeattleConfidant.com and instagram.com/thevaughnwolff mist…

1
Ep 13: Mixed queer/het relationships and bi erasure 1:07:02

2+ y ago1:07:02

1:07:02

Am I Queer Enough?? Special guest and poly pro Madeleine joins Sarah and Alex to talk about mixed marriages, bi erasure, and that sexy armpit hair on those anarchy cheerleaders in that one Nirvana video. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/

1
Ep 12: We Need To Talk 1:00:09

2+ y ago1:00:09

1:00:09

Did we just get dumped!?! Or did we just ’de-escalate’ our relationships? Sarah and Alex share some changes to their, ahem, relationship landscapes, and talk about how endings are different in non-monogamy. Bonus: Sarah explains that whole ‘attachment style’ thing everyone is always talking about. [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/…

1
Season 2 Trailer 0:45

2+ y ago0:45

0:45

Season 2 is dropping next week! Get ready for more conversations with Sarah and Alex about breakups, queer erasure, couples privilege, and more! Got an idea or a question? Hit us up on instagram: @MistakesCastBy Sarah & Alex

1
Ep 11: Advice for Opening a Relationship - Season 1 Finale! 1:05:58

3y ago1:05:58

1:05:58

Thinking about opening your marriage? This episode is full of advice from long-term couples who have transitioned to non-monogamy: common mistakes to avoid, arrangements that seem work best, and genuine guidance from folks who have been through it.By Sarah & Alex

1
Ep. 10: Cheating (and trust) 1:14:03

3y ago1:14:03

1:14:03

Sarah and Alex revisit a past infidelity. Jessica wonders if non-monogamy is an 'answer' to cheating in a relationship. Will and Jada stop by for a tearful conversation about continuing their marriage after a breach of trust. Will & Jada clip on YouTube [email protected] * https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ https://www.instagram.com/mista…

1
Ep 9: Moral Autonomy (and Reproductive Justice) 59:45

3y ago59:45

59:45

Really America, forced preganacy?? What's next? Sarah, Alex and Jessica talk about the intersections between reproductive justice and non-monogamy: How free are we to define our own morality and make our own choices? Why do we cede these choices to government or religious authorities? What happens when those authorities lose their legitimacy? NPR o…

1
Ep 8: The Monogamous Skeptic with Reagan Jackson 1:35:34

3y ago1:35:34

1:35:34

"But why tho?" A lovingly skeptical friend presses Sarah and Alex on their decision to open their marriage and gets all her nonmonogamy questions answered. Featuring Seattle artist, author, executive director and podcaster Reagan Jackson. Y-We * Reagan’s website * South End Mixtape https://www.instagram.com/mistakescast/ * [email protected]…

1
Ep 7: The Meaning of Love with Carrie Jenkins 1:02:05

3y ago1:02:05

1:02:05

"Philosophy's Crazy Ex-Girlfriend" talks about the amatonormative scripts, mental health and her new book introducing the concept of eudaimonic love. That's a lot of $5 words, but don't worry, we also talked about fish sticks and nursery rhymes. https://www.carriejenkins.net/ https://twitter.com/carriejenkins https://www.instagram.com/_carriejenkin…

1
Ep 6: Platonic Polyamory (And loving your friends) 1:03:48

3y ago1:03:48

1:03:48

A weekend retreat with a friend reminds Sarah that non-monogamy isn't just about sex. Opening/closing quote from Kai Cheng Thom: https://kaichengthom.com/ Ban on co-living: https://www.kansascity.com/news/local/article260770552.html It's your friends who break your heart: https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2022/03/why-we-lose-friends-agin…

Podcasts Worth a Listen

Jessica Partnow Podcasts

Podcasts Worth a Listen