Best ProCASTination Podcasts (2025)

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Ep. 183 - Procastination and Quitting Porn 14:57

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26d ago14:57

14:57

One of the things I have noticed in working with guys who struggle with porn is - - they also struggle with procrastination. In this episode we look at this connection and discuss some simple strategies to overcome compulsive procrastination! If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, I invite you to to sign up for Vern's Circl…

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Ep. 186 - Should I do a Dopamine Fast 21:25

5d ago21:25

21:25

There is a lot written these days about the role of dopamine in our addictive struggle with porn. One of the books "Dopamnine Nation" talks a lot about dopamine and seems to give some fairly straightword system to hack the system of recovery. In this episode we talk about how this book and a pure "dopamine approach" can be helpful in our recovery a…

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Ep. 185 - Your Guided Tour Out of Porn 20:49

12d ago20:49

20:49

Last week we popped the baloon that said that the recovery journey is simple or quick. We spoke about how long it takes to break a habit in a sustained way. Today we talk about some of the highlights we will experience on a guided tour away from porn. This guided tour explains the roadblocks we need to overcome, what are the challenges we face, and…

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Ep. 184 - How Long Does it Take to Quit Porn 20:57

19d ago20:57

20:57

There are a lot of claims on the internet about helping you quite porn in just a few weeks. Sounds great - right? In this episode Vern takes a bit of a deeper dive into the real issues (and the amount of time) that is usually needed to quit a compulsive embedded behavior such as porn. If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, …

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Ep. 182 - Learning Warfare - Lessons on Fighting Porn 26:54

1M ago26:54

26:54

The metaphor of war is used a lot in recovery for the reason that it often feels like we are in a battle!! In this episode Vern talks about principles of warfare and applies them to our recovery battle. If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, I invite you to to sign up for Vern's Circle learning platform. Just use the follow…

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Ep. 181 - The Porn Recovery Journey with Nate Larkin 30:50

1M ago30:50

30:50

By Vern Tompke - Porn Recovery Coach

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Ep. 180 - Porn Relapses Ripples and Resets 19:17

2M ago19:17

19:17

A relapse is always possible but never inevitable. There are inescapable ripples that follow a relapse but how do we prevent a slip from becoming a slide! In this episode we discuss how to get back on track when we fall off the wagon! If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, I invite you to to sign up for Vern's Circle learni…

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Ep. 179 - Marriage Hacks Pt. 3 31:04

2M ago31:04

31:04

In this third and final episode of Marriage Hacks - Vern explores some of the ways to explore why you hit a wall on certain topics with you partner as well as the idea of recognizing when you have a filter on that you need to communicate with your spouse. Your marriage is not your recovery but working towards a better marriage can help in reducing …

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Ep. 178 - Are You a Deep Fake 14:21

2M ago14:21

14:21

It seems that deep fakes are everywhere these days. My question for you is this - are you a deep fake? Are you a person with a deep disconnect between the public and private you. In this Episode I talk about how that happens and how to experience the benefits of living a life of integrity. Todays episode is summarized in a diagram that you can find…

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Ep. 177 - The 5 W's - Examining a porn relapse 21:27

2M ago21:27

21:27

In a recent television episode of The Paper the new boss teaches his employers what it takes to be a local report. Toward that end he talks about the classic rules for reporting called the 5 W's. In this episode Vern talks about this in helping us learn to be better reporters of our relapse events. If you want to get access to a host of free recove…

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Ep. 176 - Sexless Marriages - A Marriage Plea 26:56

2M ago26:56

26:56

Women Please Note: This episode is not mean to shame you if you are struggling with the after effects of the disclosure of your husbands porn use. It is meant to encourage you not remain stuck in your pain, anger and grief and get the help to see your marriage restored to the dream you had when you walked down the aisle. If you are a woman looking …

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Ep. 175 - More Marriage Hacks Pt. 2 26:53

3M ago26:53

26:53

We had so much fun last time I thought we would do it again. Actually I realized there was a number of marriage tips and hacks that didn't make the last episode so I thought we would do a part 2! Heres to having a great marriage relationship! If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, I invite you to to sign up for Vern's Circl…

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Breaking Free from the Busyness Trap - E113 10:40

3M ago10:40

10:40

Send us a text Are you busy doing the right things — or just busy being busy? In this episode of the Lead To Excel Podcast, Maureen Chiana explores the difference between survival busyness (working just to pay bills, juggling endless tasks) and purposeful living that aligns with God’s calling. Drawing from neuroscience, emotional intelligence, and …

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Ep. 174 - 5 Marriage Hacks Pt. 1 17:18

3M ago17:18

17:18

Relationships can be hard work - especially maintaining a marriage over the long haul. In this episode Vern shares 5 marriage hacks that can make that challenge be a little bit easier! If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, I invite you to to sign up for Vern's Circle learning platform. Just use the following link to get st…

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Ep. 173 - Dating Honesty - Why When and How 29:31

3M ago29:31

29:31

What should I tell my girlfriend about my porn history (or other sexual history). Should I hide it? What if honesty will end the relationship? In this episode I talk about why it is important to be honest but also nuance when and how this could be done. If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, I invite you to to sign up for V…

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Ep. 172 - Welcome Back 27:32

3M ago27:32

27:32

So how did your summer go? Vern has been away for the last month and shares somes up and downs from his summer holidays including a recovery lesson that he is working at integrating into his life. If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, I invite you to to sign up for Vern's Circle learning platform. Just use the following li…

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Ep. 171 - Porn and Men's Health - A Conversation 1:01:27

4M ago1:01:27

1:01:27

It's fun to talk to people outside your circles who dont' necessarily share your experience or assumptions. The following is a conversation I did with Jeremy Longpre from the North Star Podcast around men's health and problematic porn use. The following is a link to the North Star Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/north-star-podcast/id1…

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Ep. 170 - Breaking the Acting Out Cycle 26:00

5M ago26:00

26:00

Back in Episode 73 I introduced the idea of the Acting Out Cycle using the picture of a Stopwatch. In looking back I felt I could give a more robust explanation of how to actually stop ourselves from just repeating the same cycle over and over. To do this I add a new step - PREEMPT - and share from some of my recent examples how to put this into pr…

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Ep. 169 - Anxious vs Confident Recovery 27:36

5M ago27:36

27:36

It is not uncommon in our early recovery to feel anxious that a next relapse is just around the corner. Is there a way to grow in our confidence as we start out on this journey? If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, you need to sign up for Vern's Circle learning platform. Just use the following link to get started. if you …

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Ep. 168 - I'm Good (Until I'm Not) 17:53

5M ago17:53

17:53

One of the reasons we are unsuccessful long term in porn recovery is because of some of the ways of thinking we practice. One problematic thing that guys tell themselves is that "they are good" or 'they are strong" which is experientially true at the time. The probem is that we are good (until we are not!) If you want to get access to a host of fre…

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Ep. 167 - Disappointed in Sex 19:43

6M ago19:43

19:43

What is the difference between real sex and our porn binges? The differences might explain why some people confess that real sex is hard and less exciting than our porn world. In this episode Vern explores that uncomfortable question and how we can grow towards real intimacy with a real person. If you want to get access to a host of free recovery r…

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Ep. 166 - Relationships on the Line 31:13

6M ago31:13

31:13

What if positive feelings toward your wife were a powerful motivator to move away from porn. In this episode Vern builds on a recent book he read called "Cherish" by Gary Thomas. If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, you need to sign up for Vern's Circle learning platform. Just use the following link to get started. if you…

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Why You’re Still Stuck - Even After Doing Everything Right - E112 34:19

6M ago34:19

34:19

Send us a text In this episode, I unpack a powerful truth many avoid: sometimes, the delay we experience after prayer isn’t spiritual — it’s internal. Using a blend of neuroscience, emotional intelligence, mindset, and scripture, she explores the hidden reasons we stay stuck, even when we’ve prayed, planned, and believed. You’ll discover: Why procr…

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Ep. 165 - Is Your Door Closing? 16:25

7M ago16:25

16:25

Country songs are known for their - "if only I knew then what I know now" regret songs. In this episode we ask a sobering question - is the door to your marriage closing and share a principle that Vern has practiced and taught for 40 years. If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, you need to sign up for Vern's Circle learnin…

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Ep. 164 - What Set Me Up for Porn (with Tim Fletcher) 31:53

7M ago31:53

31:53

Have you ever wondered what set you up for your struggle with porn? In this interview Vern talks with Tim Fletcher who is an extremely popular Youtube expert on the subject all things trauma and attachement. In addition to Tim Fletchers Youtube Channel you can find some of his helpful information on his website https://www.timfletcher.ca/ If you wa…

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Ep. 163 - When Porn Crashes Your Marriage (with Barbara Steffens) 36:20

7M ago36:20

36:20

When porn use is disclosed (or found out) in a relationships it often comes with a thudding crash. In this episode expert Barbara Steffens talks through the impact this can have on a woman and steps that both men and women can take in their navigating a path forward. What can we learn from a relapse? In this episode one of Vern's coaching clients b…

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Ep. 162 - Lessons from a Relapse (with Hercule Flambeau) 34:19

8M ago34:19

34:19

What can we learn from a relapse? In this episode one of Vern's coaching clients bravely shares what he learned from a recent relapse in the hopes that it can also be instructive to other listeners. The song at the end can be downloaded in the circle learning platform below... If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, you need…

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It’s Not in Your Genes — It’s in Your Mind - E111 20:58

8M ago20:58

20:58

Send us a text Have you ever believed you were limited by your background, family history, or genetics? In this episode, Maureen reveals the powerful truth: your beliefs, expectations, and mindset shape your reality more than your genes ever will. Drawing from neuroscience, scripture, and real-life studies, Maureen shows how your brain can be rewir…

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Ep. 161 - Wave Go To's Part 2 20:03

8M ago20:03

20:03

In this episode Vern goes back to the topic of dealing with a wave of temptation and craving. In this episode he argues that we need to strengthen our understanding of connection and also introduces a couple of "Go To's" that he uses when he is in the middle of experience a Wave. The first reading is based on the Bible App (Psalm 119 - the Message)…

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Ep. 160 - Waves of Craving 14:22

8M ago14:22

14:22

Do you ever feel that craving hits you like a big wave? In this episode Vern provides hope that the next big wave doesn't need to overwhelm you! If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, you need to sign up for Vern's Circle learning platform. This is how sign up for the free circle learning resources Vern has to offer. If pri…

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One Doctor’s Revolution: Transforming Lives Through Medicine and Technology - E110 59:38

8M ago59:38

59:38

Send us a text In this inspiring episode, Dr. Njide Okonjo-Udochi shares her journey from growing up in academic communities across West Africa to revolutionising healthcare for underserved populations. Raised by professor parents who instilled a commitment to excellence, she developed a relentless drive that shaped her path as a physician entrepre…

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Ep. 159 - The Hidden Costs of Porn Use 21:20

8M ago21:20

21:20

Most of us are tempted to think that our porn use is free. Sure we may not be "paying" for porn but you are paying in ways you many not even realize it. Today we talk about the "hidden costs" of our porn use. If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, you need to sign up for Vern's Circle learning platform. This is how sign up …

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Ep. 158 - Dial it In 21:11

9M ago21:11

21:11

Did you ever start a day feeling "off". Today's podcast is all about "dialling your day" in to maximize the chance of the day going well. If you want to get access to a host of free recovery resources, you need to sign up for Vern's Circle learning platform. This is how sign up for the free circle learning resources Vern has to offer. If privacy is…

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Why Your Resolutions Fail – And What to Do Instead - E109 16:43

9M ago16:43

16:43

Send us a text Every year, millions set New Year's resolutions—but most fail within weeks. Why? It’s not about willpower, but identity, belief, and alignment with your purpose. In this episode, we dive into the neuroscience behind lasting change. ✅ The hidden reason resolutions don’t stick ✅ Why your beliefs determine your results ✅ The faith-based…

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Ep. 157 - Ten Rules for Life 30:49

9M ago30:49

30:49

This episode is a bit different. One of the benefits of recovery from constantly battling with porn is that you can now start to think more clearly about how you want your life to go. In this episode Vern shares 10 principles he has landed on to guide his thoughts and actions. A summary of these principles is found on the circle learning platform u…

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Ep. 156 - The Porn Adjacent Challenge 18:37

10M ago18:37

18:37

One of the biggest challenges that is new in the porn recovery area is the new pattern of staying away from porn but engaging in all sorts of porn adjacent behaviors. Sure its not porn but it is just a perpetuation of the same sort of addictive behavior with the same sort of negative results. In this episode Vern challenges us to change the way we …

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One Thought Away From Transformation - E108 18:37

10M ago18:37

18:37

Send us a text Unlock the secrets to transforming your life by harnessing the power of your thoughts with me, Maureen Chiana, on the Lead to Excel podcast. In this episode, I share an inspiring story of a woman who revolutionised her leadership journey through a shift in mindset. Discover the profound impact your thoughts have on your destiny and t…

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Ep. 155 - Those Pesky Emotions 23:33

10M ago23:33

23:33

We spend a lot of time trying to block ourselves from external threats using content filters, removing problematic apps etc. The peskier problem, however, has to do with our emotions. Wherever we go there we are. In this episode Vern unpackages what those problematic emotions are, the way porn promises to meet those emotions and how we can transtio…

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Ep. 154 - A Punch in the Face 17:39

10M ago17:39

17:39

What is the actual problems that porn causes men? Wtihout needing to take on the porn industry - I walk through as succintly as I can some of the common side effects that are proving so problematic with porn. So here's to avoiding a punch in the face! A summary of this article is found on my free circle platform. If you would like to get access to …

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Ep. 153 - Theme for 2025 18:18

11M ago18:18

18:18

We are starting a brand new group for 2025! This group will consist of 5-7 men who want to journey together throught the finding traction course. Our next group will be starting January 2025 on Wednesdays at 9 pm. Eastern. If you want more information on how to become part of one of these groups reach out to me at [email protected]. To …

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Ep. 152 - Unleash the Man Within with Sathiya Sam 34:20

11M ago34:20

34:20

Today It is my priviledge to introduce a fellow recovery coach. Sathiya Sam has an inspiring story of how to walk free from porn and move towards a larger vision for one's life. Sathiya Sam's podcast is called "Man Within" and his recovery resources can be accessed at https://www.sathiyasam.com/ We are starting new groups all the time for 5-7 men w…

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Ep. 151 - Motorcyles Mouthwash and Magical Thinking 24:28

11M ago24:28

24:28

As we get ready for Christmas - I thought I'd fill our stockings with some random recovery ideas. Yes they are random - but in them hopefully you can find something to avoid being nice (not naughty) this holiday season! We are starting new groups all the time for 5-7 men who want to journey together throught the finding traction course. Our next gr…

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Ep. 150 - Faulty Approaches Redux (with Matt Dobscheutz) 41:08

11M ago41:08

41:08

Last weeks' episode felt unfinished to me. I thought it would be great to have to have my fellow coach Matt Dobscheutz come on and add his thoughts to the topic of why some guys fail to achieve the recovery success they say they desire. We are starting new groups all the time for 5-7 men who want to journey together throught the finding traction co…

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Ep. 149 - 6 Recovery Approaches Bound to Fail 22:08

11M ago22:08

22:08

I have coached guys in porn recovery groups for many years. Over the years I have seen various guys try various things that have proven to be unhelpful in overcoming porn. In today's episode I explore 6 ways that I think that guys (even guys in groups) set themselves up to be unsuccessful in recovery. We are starting new groups all the time for 5-7…

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Ep. 148 - How Did I Get Here? 21:37

12M ago21:37

21:37

When I meet new guys I like to ask them this question "How did porn get embedded in your life?" Over and over again I hear some version of the same story. Today I want to talk about the process about how porn became a problem for you because it provides clues for how we can begin to journey out of it. We are starting new groups all the time for 5-7…

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Ep. 147 - Direct from Brazil 19:37

12M ago19:37

19:37

Vern has been down in Brazil working with couples around marriage and men in the area of recovery. Take a listen to some of his thoughts and screwups direct from the land down under (the other land down under) We are starting new finding traction groups this fall to help 5-7 guys at a time connect around walking away from porn and moving towards a …

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Ep. 146 - Before the Day After 16:21

1y ago16:21

16:21

November 5th is a big day - its Guy Fawkes Day, Vern's Birthday and yes - the American election. How deal with the big feelings that will follow the election can make us truly vulnerable to relapse. Vern walks through how we navigate these strong emotions. We are starting new finding traction groups this fall to help 5-7 guys at a time connect arou…

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Ep. 145 - Welcome to Plan B 21:30

1y ago21:30

21:30

There are two types of pathways we can walk in recovery - Plan A is the one we prefer and we have all tried it - unsuccessfully. This episode is about Plan B - and why we end up having to follow this route. We are starting new finding traction groups this fall to help 5-7 guys at a time connect around walking away from porn and moving towards a bet…

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Ep. 144 - Porn Free Millennial 46:46

1y ago46:46

46:46

A big step of recovery is when you turn around and help guys who are not as far along the journey as you are. Mac is one of the guys I coach and he has created a great podcast that he shares with younger guys - it's called porn free millenial and you can access it here. https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/porn-free-millennial-podcast/id1688517945…

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Ep. 143 - What is Your Primal Question? 25:18

1y ago25:18

25:18

What is the Primal Need which drives your behaviors, informs your fears and causes you to reach for your medicine jar? (porn) In this episode Vern asks the question "If porn is our favorite solution, then what is the primal question we are seeking to answer or problem we are seeking to solve? If you are interested in reading the book, 7 Primal Ques…