We’re back with Part 2 of our marriage rewind—picking up where we left off and diving deeper into how our perspectives, habits, and relationship dynamics have evolved over the last 9 years. If you enjoyed Part 1, this one’s even more fun. Let’s just say… growth is humbling. 😅 ‌ Next episode recommended: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-120-…

We just hit 9 years of marriage, so we’re taking a fun look back at year 1 on all the ways life has changed since and what we’ve learned along the way. ‌ Next episode recommended: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-70-8-years-strong-part-1-reviewing-reddits-marriage/id1661247515?i=1000651760696 ‌ Table Talks with the Tares: conversations that…

In this episode, we’re diving into what it looks like to recognize narcissistic traits in someone and how to set healthy boundaries without losing yourself in the process. Ash talks through some of the signs, the emotional toll it can take, and what it looks like to navigate those relationships with clarity and compassion. If you’ve ever felt drain…

In this episode, we pick up where we left off and dive into part 2 of our discipleship conversation—this time unpacking the idea that discipleship is more like a lab, or apprenticeship, than a lecture process. It’s meant to involve on-the-job training that exposes the vulnerable parts of your life where you are obeying and following Jesus. If you’v…

We’ve been asking ourselves: What does discipleship really look like in 2025? After listening to a podcast episode by Jeremy Prior on life-on-life discipleship, we’ve found ourselves rethinking what it means to be a disciple-maker. This episode is raw and honest and full of real-time processing. If you’ve ever felt like discipleship should be more …

In this episode Ashley interviews MJ to get his take and experience being married to a vacillator. We discuss the experience in our marriage over the last 9 years and the journey of a vacillator/avoider couple. Resources mentioned: Book: How We Love, Expanded Edition: Discover Your Love Style, Enhance Your Marriage Love Style Quiz: What is a Love S…

In this episode we're discussing how we're approaching having baby #3. Is this third one really easier or is it really just adding more to the chaos of parenting? Resources mentioned: Podcast Juice: https://www.buffalotracedistillery.com/our-brands/buffalo-trace.html Table Talks with the Tares: conversations that inspire personal growth in leadersh…

In this episode we talk about the different default settings we have when we consider bringing up offenses someone has committed against you. One prefers to confront with it, the other would rather absorb it and move on. We explore our unique approaches to the issue of confrontation and how it helps us shape a balanced ethic when teaching correctio…

In this episode, we reflect on our time with my mom and how her visit highlighted the cultural differences in how we each handle conflict—one shaped by honor/shame and the other by justice/guilt. We explore how these deep-rooted approaches surface in marriage and what it means to navigate apologies, accountability, and grace when worlds collide. Re…

In this episode, I interview Ash about what it's like being married to an avoider. We talk about the challenges of adjusting to a love style that is different from your own and the ways we've had to grow in how to relate to one another. Resources mentioned: How We Love, Expanded Edition: Discover Your Love Style, Enhance Your Marriage Next episode …

In this episode we do another hot take with Ashley on a question prompt I gave her regarding the duties of parents in a family. Our discussion moves in several different directions talking about what we think and how we would want to approach leading our family. Table Talks with the Tares: conversations that inspire personal growth in leadership in…

We revisit my previous statement about how the Great Commission may not be for everyone. I clarify that statement in this episode saying that while cross cultural evangelism may not be, the call for all believers is to make disciples. Episode mentioned: Ep 108 - Fear of Failure Driving the Holy Search for God's Will in Your Life, On Considering Obe…

I put Ashley on the hot seat by getting into this conversation without warning or context. I like to get her first drafts on things and so in this conversation we talk about how she has felt she's changed in being able to identify her needs. The conversation morphs into talking about whether or not she thinks she's a people pleaser and how she's le…

We unpack how in some cases our search for God's will is seen as a pursuit of holiness but in reality is a fear of failure that could bring ruin to your life. The beauty of the Gospel is that we've already been found out as failures, and the Lord has provided a way out through his son, Jesus Christ. We talk about the implications for a family looki…

We talk about the rapid development of Artificial Intelligence and some of the ways we’re currently using it in our house. Then we also discuss how we should think about these quick changes in the technological world we live in as a Christian family. How do we live in the technological world honoring the Lord in how we engage with it. Do we engage …

I interview Ashley in this one on what has been the motivating factor for why she basically automatically sets goals for her year at the beginning of each year. We are so different in this regard so we talk about how we approach goal setting from opposite angles. We talk about the goals we’re setting, the systems we use, and the approaches we take.…

In this episode, we flesh out my (MJ's) initial reactions after Ashley's orders of 2 books arrive at our house. Initially it was a cringy and uncomfortable thought to even entertain having to bring this up to our kids, but after talking it further with her, realized that this conversation might come up a lot sooner than we think. Resources mentione…

As we approach the holidays, I wanted to talk about how we've thought about rest during this time of year. We talk about how social media (or whatever form of endless screen-time/scrolling you pursue) robs you of the rest the Lord wants from you. We also detail how we practice rest through the form of a Saturday Sabbath rest and how that looks like…

As our oldest starts out Kindergarten next year, we have started the discussion and research in finding what we believe to be the best education option for her. We came from diverse educational backgrounds and naturally reverted back to our own experiences as what we believed to be optimal, but after digging through all the options available in our…

We grew up just anticipating Christmas for the gifts. But now as parents of young kids, we see the significance of creating rhythms as a family and how it has led to our flourishing. But as a household where our cultural backgrounds are so different from each other, we see these seasonal celebrations as opportunity to create something unique for ou…

We used to really make sure Thanksgiving was such a special meal and time as a family which came with a ton of stress and hustle to get the dinner ready on time. But then our regular practice of gratitude by having a weekly "all-out" meal together as a family as a way of experiencing God's goodness in our life changed how we view the holiday today.…

In this conversation, Ash opens up on how her experience growing up with adopted siblings joining her family's home changed her and shaped her into the adult and parent she is today. She specifically talks about how facing the chaos and volatility of parenting young ones brings to the surface some of the experiences she had in childhood and how it …

We're dealing with our leaky shower and tackling this problem has revealed more than the source of where the water is coming from. Our differences in personality types, problem solving approach, and project management style come to light when trying to tackle projects around the house. Tune in for a conversation where a little project around the ho…

This is an extended discussion on our need to put the family meeting back in place on our family rhythm. As a visionary/strategic couple, some of the things we prioritize are different at times, so I try to suggest this as a remedy to get us back on the same page. Table Talks with the Tares: conversations that inspire personal growth in leadership …

In this episode we talk about my (MJ's) first time to go out to vote for a President! I talk about how it compares to the voting system in Austria as a multi-party socialist governing body and the policies of this seemingly consequential election. Resources mentioned: Lacrae interview with Matt Chandler: Lecrae Has a DEEP Convo with Matt Chandler o…

In this episode we talk about the journey of experiencing the loss of my dad this past summer. The 6 year journey of his battle with metastasized prostate cancer and the good things that I was able to see along the way. I share the importance of being able to share the journey with someone and also the cultural differences as a person who lives in …

In this episode we talk about how we handled the transition from Virginia to North Carolina and how we challenged ourselves to focus on seeing what is good that can come from this type of change. We talk through how we view the change actually impacts our children and discuss the importance of having a perspective of Paul's challenge in Scripture t…

In this episode, we explore the growing movement of dads who want to be fully present in their children’s lives and how this aligns with our calling as men through Christ’s work of provision and protection. We’ll discuss how fatherhood today involves more than just providing materially but also being deeply involved in shaping our children’s spirit…

In this episode we talk about how we are building our "perfect" week by establishing a night off for each of us so we can set aside the parent hat and use the evening to do something that we find restful. As a couple that is completely the opposite to their spouse, we have had to be very open and direct about what we need from each other which has …

In this episode, we reflect on how COVID-19 reshaped our approach to parenting and the ways it highlights our desire to raise resilient children. We also discuss the challenges of balancing motherhood’s impact on personal freedom, alongside societal assumptions about being home full time. We talk through the things we value most in what we want to …

In this episode, we open up about the challenges of navigating grief while managing a family with toddlers, sharing how we’ve coped with loss and found strength in God’s goodness if you take time to see it all around you. From solo parenting during a funeral to the emotional toll of change, we discuss the importance of grace, both for ourselves and…

In this podcast, we tackle talk about the challenges and rewards of working from home with kids in the house. We talk tips like treating specific parts of the house a certain way and the value of noise canceling headphones. The second part of the conversation is our discussion started off with an innocent question from our 4-year old on "Dad, what …

In this podcast, we wrestle through balance of maintaining a strong, loving relationship while raising a family. We'll dive into the challenges you face when connection shifts from partners to parents and how to avoid drifting apart. From redefining date nights to fostering genuine connection, we discuss practical strategies for keeping your relati…

In this episode, we explore the complexities of authority, from the consent of the governed to the potential pitfalls of earned expertise, based on our recent trip to Austria, which is a socialist country. We discuss how different economic systems, like capitalism and socialism, shape power dynamics and individual freedoms. We also examine the dang…

In this episode we dive into the intricate dynamics of multicultural families, where language, tradition, and identity overlap. Join us as we explore the challenges of navigating conversations in different languages, the cultural weight of honor, and the journey of raising kids in a multiethnic context. Despite the complexities, we uncover the prof…

In this episode, we dive into how we tag-team our parenthood, described specifically by our recent adventure of flying with two toddlers. We reflect on how the pandemic shaped our approach to working and parenting together, emphasizing the importance of sharing responsibilities and supporting each other. Join us for an honest discussion on navigati…

In this episode, we dive into the unexpected wisdom gleaned from the hit TV show Clarkson’s Farm, highlighting the characters we enjoy watching and the insights we get into the world of modern agriculture. Jeremy Clarkson’s humorously profane and heartfelt journey into farming teaches valuable lessons about the hard work involved with being a farme…

In this sensitive episode, we explore the stark contrasts between living with grief and supporting someone through it. Ashley shares her journey of losing a loved one, while the MJ offers a perspective of how someone without firsthand experience feels about suffering. Table Talks with the Tares: conversations that inspire personal growth in leaders…

This is part two about our conversation around navigating life’s ebbs and flows as a vacillator/avoider couple especially when one is experiencing a high, but the other is not. Episodes mentioned: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-25-how-we-love-argue-the-vacillator-how-it-affects/id1661247515?i=1000613984775 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/po…

In this episode, we delve into the complexities of relationships between Avoider and Vacillator partners, exploring how these dynamics play into how we go through the highs and lows of life. We also discuss the thankless but crucial role of motherhood, discussing the unique challenges and rewards that come with it. We learn something new about each…

In this episode, we share our experiences and lessons learned from past flights with our two toddlers. We'll discuss the mistakes we've made and how we're applying those lessons to ensure a smoother journey this time. Tune in for practical tips and strategies we're using to prepare for success on our upcoming flight. ‌ Resources mentioned: ‌ Next e…

In this heartfelt episode, I talk to Ash about where I’m at with my dad's declining health. We talk through the beauty, hope, and complexity of coping with family illness and the fears that come with it. Join us for an intimate conversation about love, support, and facing life's toughest moments together as a family. Table Talks with the Tares: con…

In this episode, we explore Ashley's journey to uncover the root cause of her sleepless nights. After consulting with three different medical professionals, she finally discovered the root cause. And it surprised us both. Join us as we dive into her story and share insights on managing restful sleep. Table Talks with the Tares: conversations that i…

In this episode, we wrap up our series on marriage preparation advice by sharing insights on meeting "the one" and the journey that follows. We'll discuss our personal experiences and the valuable lessons we've learned along the way. Plus, we'll talk about the important things we hope to teach our kids about love and relationships. Table Talks with…

In this episode we dive deeper into the "preparing for marriage" advice and focus on what you can do during your single years. We’ll share our own experiences before tying the knot and insights into making the most of your singleness. Join us at the table! Table Talks with the Tares: conversations that inspire personal growth in leadership in every…

In this episode, we’re taking a hard look at why "preparing for marriage" might actually be bad advice. We’ll chat about how it can make you think you’re not married just because you weren’t prepared enough. Join us as we dive into our experience in singleness. Table Talks with the Tares: conversations that inspire personal growth in leadership in …

In this special episode, we unveil the purpose behind the podcast and announce the launch of our new website. Discover why we're passionate about encouraging you to reflect on the effectiveness of your leadership. Sign up for our newsletter to receive monthly emails on leadership effectiveness and be the first to know about any updates from our pod…

In this episode we discuss and review a podcast on the dangers of parenting philosophies becoming too protective of our kids. We review a thought provoking podcast challenging parents to basically stop coddling their children and we discuss the challenges in transitioning a child from being completely dependent on their mother to a fully functionin…

In this episode, buckle up as we share our journey of prioritizing practicality over prestige in our car purchase. From weighing the pros and cons of different types of cars to different price points, MJ lays out the factors that guided our decision-making process. Join us as we drive down the road to finding a reliable and economical vehicle that …

Join us as we dive into managing finances as a married couple of 8 years. In this episode, we share how we prioritize experiences over things and why being aligned on spending decisions is crucial in our relationship. From budgeting for travel adventures to embracing the joy of shared experiences, discover how we make decisions on money in our marr…