Addicted to Red Vines by Kyle SouzaBy Kyle Souza

Don't Get Blood On The Carpet by Kyle SouzaBy Kyle Souza

No one looks at my wife and thinks "basketball", and rightly so.By Kyle Souza

The "pumpkining" has gone too far!By Kyle Souza

Instead of abbreviating a well know phrase my grandma will shorten a whole sentence to just the first letters, or as she would text me: IOAAWKPMGWSAWSTJTFL.By Kyle Souza

Yes, yes I can - stop trying to trick me into validating your terrible taste buds.By Kyle Souza

I don't regret saying "no", and definitely could have regretted saying "yes".By Kyle Souza

What am I doing with five dozen donuts?By Kyle Souza

Your dad makes "yucky brownies" that are just for adults?By Kyle Souza

There has just been too much going on lately.By Kyle Souza

I don't watch sports much, but when I do, I have questions.By Kyle Souza

If you have a twenty person team, and you each have one year of experience, you do not have twenty years of experience, you just don't.By Kyle Souza

I want to be VERY CLEAR, I am talking about listening to a podcast together; just listening to a pod cast, NOTHING ELSE.By Kyle Souza

I don't always make good decisions.By Kyle Souza

Home has a great soundtrack and some good moments, this one is Jaspyn's favorite.By Kyle Souza

The disappointment on her face was so real.By Kyle Souza

Oatmeal raisin is the worst of the "popular" cookies.By Kyle Souza

You ever tell a waiter "You too!" when they tell you to enjoy your food? It's kind of like that.By Kyle Souza

The dogs were having fun.By Kyle Souza

And it looks like Liam still doesn't like Bono.By Kyle Souza

It's corny, but I think it's hilarious.By Kyle Souza

Missing one little letter can make a big difference in what you're trying to say.By Kyle Souza

If it looks like a trash bag full of trash you're going to have a hard time remembering that it's not.By Kyle Souza

The good news is, I've learned how to change a diaper since then.By Kyle Souza

Apparently my three year old likes The Beastie Boys.By Kyle Souza

Mazzie has nine nipples... NINE.By Kyle Souza

No one's buying that.By Kyle Souza

You're necking out in the open and I'm the weirdo?By Kyle Souza

My dog is not smart, cute, but not smart.By Kyle Souza

I'm not saying I'm a good person for doing it, but I did it and it worked.By Kyle Souza

As long as you're not last you're good, right?By Kyle Souza

She got me with that one.By Kyle Souza

I do love Chuck E Cheese though.By Kyle Souza

Pick your nose, lose your finger.By Kyle Souza

I just don't get it.By Kyle Souza

I have too many chins to endorse a fitness product.By Kyle Souza

I don't understand people racist, on so many levels.By Kyle Souza

It's not because I try.By Kyle Souza

Jaspyn calls them "wee-a-tards", and they're pretty much her favorite thing to wear.By Kyle Souza

Hey guys, it's not up to you if a woman is comfortable around you, especially if she has to bare her chest.By Kyle Souza

You enter me blind, and leave seeing... what am I?By Kyle Souza

Thank God for people with chainsaws, right?By Kyle Souza

Seriously, not a doubt in my mind.By Kyle Souza

If you don't get mad at me for not knowing sports I won't get mad at you for not knowing sci-fi.By Kyle Souza

I don't think I got what she was trying to say.By Kyle Souza

I'm not afraid of much, but there are a couple things on my list of fears.By Kyle Souza

Did you get your sibling in trouble on purpose? I tried to.By Kyle Souza

My daughter Jaspyn is total drama, and I love every inch of her for it.By Kyle Souza

I'd get grounded from everything as a kid, and I mean everything - like jelly on toast; yep, I got grounded from putting jelly on toast...By Kyle Souza

People like to be compared to celebrities, usually...By Kyle Souza