Best Paul Colaianni Podcasts (2025)

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Can you ever go back to who you were? 26:36

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7h ago26:36

26:36

In abusive relationships it might be difficult or even impossible to discern which parts of yourself are truly you and which are shaped by the abuse. Let's talk about what it takes to start building or rebuilding your identity.

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The fears and insecurities that push away those who get too close 40:04

1d ago40:04

40:04

If you get close to someone, they see the most vulnerable, deeper part of you. That can be a scary thing, especially if you've been hurt before. And sometimes we feel the need to protect ourself from such scary things.By Paul Colaianni

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Are you giving away your power? 31:03

9d ago31:03

31:03

Some people seem to have a toxic gravitational pull that affects everyone around them. And whether you're with them or not, they are either on your mind or in your space. Getting away from their influence can feel impossible.By Paul Colaianni

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Never trust someone who wants to change who you are 18:25

12d ago18:25

18:25

You walk into an emotionally abusive relationship as one person, but where do you go after you're in one for a while? Is the person you're with trying to change you into someone you're not?By Paul Colaianni

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The way we tell others to go away may make them stay 44:20

17d ago44:20

44:20

If you’ve ever wondered how to keep toxic people out of your life or if you’re questioning the role of personal boundaries in shaping your reality, this episode is for you. I share insights on why the words you choose matter, how to express your boundaries clearly, and why some relationships require you to be as steadfast as a lighthouse in a storm…

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The love of my life is the abuser in my life 40:36

22d ago40:36

40:36

Love can feel like a double-edged sword, cutting deep despite the tender moments. Or is that really love? Caring and kindness mixed with toxic, controlling behaviors create a dangerous emotional cocktail of bonding and trauma.By Paul Colaianni

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The wife who seems unfazed by her husband's family health 43:44

24d ago43:44

43:44

If your partner seems uninterested in your family, does that signal a deeper issue? I’ll dive into this area with a specific question from an upset husband wanting to wrap his head around the realization that his wife doesn't seem at all interested in his family's health situation.By Paul Colaianni

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From dark to light - the path to courage 38:02

1M ago38:02

38:02

The path to empowerment sometimes involves massive, scary steps that might just change you... for the better. What it takes is courage. Where can you find the courage? It's closer than you think.By Paul Colaianni

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Can someone change even after they've done something terrible to you? 42:29

1M ago42:29

42:29

They did the worst thing imaginable and now want you to stay in their life. Is it possible they can change? Should you give them a chance?By Paul Colaianni

1
Every opportunity offers a choice to stay the same or change forever 38:17

1M ago38:17

38:17

Are you walking around with unresolved feelings from your past? There are many opportunities that come our way that give us a chance to move forward without being weighed down by our past.By Paul Colaianni

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Constant bickering back and forth 44:18

2M ago44:18

44:18

What do you do when there's bickering and nitpicking and you never seem make progress because there's always some unresolved issue or drama that needs to unfold for some reason?By Paul Colaianni

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You're stuck and there's nothing you can do about it 30:32

2M ago30:32

30:32

When you know for a fact it's impossible to get out of the situation you're in, something might come along and push you so far that you find the impossible just might be possible after all.By Paul Colaianni

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When your best intentions turn into their disappointment 41:35

2M ago41:35

41:35

The perfect night... almost. I read a reddit post where a user outlines a scenario where his best laid plans didn't pan out as he hoped, but he almost got everything right. That is, until his wife felt disappointed and unhappy by a single error that changed everything.By Paul Colaianni

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You being the center of their attention is most of the problem 32:05

2M ago32:05

32:05

What does it take for an abusive person to change? A whole lot (if they even want to change), but this one component of healing is often one of the hardest for them to stop. Their consistent focus on you can make their healing and change much more difficult, let alone having no time and space to heal yourself.…

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Is that really you inside your head? 34:49

2M ago34:49

34:49

Our inner critic can be our own worst enemy. Knowing where that voice comes from and if what it's saying is actually true can mean the difference between your happiness and your sanity - hopefully you get to keep both!By Paul Colaianni

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When someone wants to change who you are 35:17

2M ago35:17

35:17

The one-off difficulties in relationships are perfectly normal for everyone. They're not welcome, necessarily, but normal. But what happens when the "one-offs" become systemic? What happens when they are non-stop? That's when changes are inevitable.By Paul Colaianni

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Some people are a black hole of suck all your life then they're gone 33:34

2M ago33:34

33:34

The person who has been a toxic presence in my and my family's life has died. It's not necessarily a normal episode, but hopefully you'll gain something from it as I share the story and the lessons.By Paul Colaianni

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Those who never follow through what they say they're going to do 29:31

3M ago29:31

29:31

Some people seem to be stuck in a cycle of promises and no follow-through. When is enough enough? Some people use delay after delay to get away with never having to follow through with anything. Those people usually never change.By Paul Colaianni

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When you want to be more than friends 44:56

3M ago44:56

44:56

What do you do when you ask a friend if they would like to be closer, but they say no? The ramifications on the friendship can be anywhere from nothing to complete disaster. Is there a way back to being friends after such an awkward event?By Paul Colaianni

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The empty threats that keep the abuse cycle alive 32:46

3M ago32:46

32:46

When they threaten to leave or take something away from you, but they never follow through, expect them to repeat that behavior indefinitely. Empty threats are effective on those who fear them coming true. There is a way to stop the empty threats (but you probably won't like it).

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When you should avoid making decisions with lasting consequences 34:08

3M ago34:08

34:08

Some decisions have a long-lasting effect. Sometimes that effect is positive; Sometimes it's not. . When you decide to get into or out of something, it's vital you don't set yourself up for failure and regret.By Paul Colaianni

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Life isn't exactly fulfilling when you are holding on to upset toward someone 31:03

3M ago31:03

31:03

When you're holding on to that little bit of anger or upset about or toward someone else, maybe someone who is not even in your life anymore, it can decrease the quality of your happiness, maybe even diminishing it to a mere sliver of what it could be.By Paul Colaianni

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Trying to figure out who the emotionally abusive person really is in the relationship 42:09

4M ago42:09

42:09

You'd think it'd be easy to figure out: The hurtful one is the abusive one. But what happens when the victim gets convinced they are the abuser? Determining that while in the abuse cycle can sometimes be very difficult. However, I make it very clear in this episode.By Paul Colaianni

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Stay in control or let it go? 42:55

4M ago42:55

42:55

Do we have to carry the weight of our past negative experiences into our future? Staying in control and letting go of it have the very same effect. I get into more detail about that in this episode about choice.By Paul Colaianni

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The games our loved ones play 38:22

4M ago38:22

38:22

"Go ahead, have a great time! Wait, are you leaving without me? What about my needs? No, I mean go ahead and have fun. I'll be good! Hey, don't feel bad about leaving me alone, I'll be fine. Oh, you don't feel bad? Why are you leaving me alone? How can you do this to me?" Need I say more?By Paul Colaianni

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What is love? 53:49

4M ago53:49

53:49

How you define love will be what you get from it. If you don't have a definition for love, you may get stuck with something that appears to be love, but is really something else altogether. If you are 100% happy with the people you love in your life, skip this episode.By Paul Colaianni

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When a relationship is not a relationship 25:22

4M ago25:22

25:22

"Everything's great with me," they say, as you sit there staring, confused, wondering what the hell you're missing because you're having a completely different experience as them. When is a relationship not an actual relationship anymore?By Paul Colaianni

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Never put your faith in anyone who makes you feel unworthy 27:58

4M ago27:58

27:58

People who care about you should lift you up, not kick you when you're down. If someone keeps dragging you lower, trusting their words is like giving a vampire the keys to the blood bank.By Paul Colaianni

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When every argument is petty and unresolved 38:54

5M ago38:54

38:54

Arguing isn't fun, but if it's going to happen, it should at least be productive. But what if it's never productive and you never get anything resolved? That's the question I tackle today.By Paul Colaianni

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Don't lock yourself into a worse situation 32:10

5M ago32:10

32:10

When you get into an emotionally abusive relationship, you have no idea what you're walking into. When you figure it out, you might have to make some tough choices. One of those choices might lead to getting deeper into something you know is bad for you.By Paul Colaianni

Paul Colaianni Podcasts

1
The Overwhelmed Brain

Paul Colaianni

1
Love and Abuse

Paul Colaianni

1
Can you ever go back to who you were? 26:36

1
The fears and insecurities that push away those who get too close 40:04

1
Are you giving away your power? 31:03

1
Never trust someone who wants to change who you are 18:25

1
The way we tell others to go away may make them stay 44:20

1
The love of my life is the abuser in my life 40:36

1
The wife who seems unfazed by her husband's family health 43:44

1
From dark to light - the path to courage 38:02

1
Can someone change even after they've done something terrible to you? 42:29

1
Every opportunity offers a choice to stay the same or change forever 38:17

1
Constant bickering back and forth 44:18

1
You're stuck and there's nothing you can do about it 30:32

1
When your best intentions turn into their disappointment 41:35

1
You being the center of their attention is most of the problem 32:05

1
Is that really you inside your head? 34:49

1
When someone wants to change who you are 35:17

1
Some people are a black hole of suck all your life then they're gone 33:34

1
Those who never follow through what they say they're going to do 29:31

1
When you want to be more than friends 44:56

1
The empty threats that keep the abuse cycle alive 32:46

1
When you should avoid making decisions with lasting consequences 34:08

1
Life isn't exactly fulfilling when you are holding on to upset toward someone 31:03

1
Trying to figure out who the emotionally abusive person really is in the relationship 42:09

1
Stay in control or let it go? 42:55

1
The games our loved ones play 38:22

1
What is love? 53:49

1
When a relationship is not a relationship 25:22

1
Never put your faith in anyone who makes you feel unworthy 27:58

1
When every argument is petty and unresolved 38:54

1
Don't lock yourself into a worse situation 32:10