Best Xander Marin Qcode Podcasts (2025)

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EPISODE 207 The Foreplay Episode: The 5 Things We’re All Getting Wrong 1:07:33

6d ago1:07:33

1:07:33

Ready for our go-to masterclass on one of the most overlooked (but absolutely essential) parts of intimacy? We’re bringing back one of our most downloaded episodes of all time — and trust us, it’s worth a re-listen (or a first-time bender if you’re new around here). Foreplay — the most misunderstood, rushed-through, and skipped-over part of sex. Bu…

1
Episode 206: Butt Stuff 101: Everything You’re Too Afraid To Ask 1:01:02

13d ago1:01:02

1:01:02

We’re bringing back a fan favorite this week… and yep, we’re going there. Butt stuff. 🍑 Back in 2021, we dropped an episode all about backdoor play, and it quickly became one of our most popular episodes of all time. With over 200 Pillow Talks episodes under our belts now, we figured it was time to make it a little easier to find the gems — so for …

1
EPISODE 205: Couples Coaching Session: How To Ask For More Even If You Don’t Know What You Want 57:18

20d ago57:18

57:18

We’re back this week with another coaching episode — where we listen to real voice notes from real listeners who are navigating some seriously relatable challenges. From craving more pleasure but not knowing how to ask for it… to dealing with desire differences after kids and trying to orgasm for the first time (yes, ever) — we’re holding space for…

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EPISODE 204: Confessions Of An Overactive Bladder 55:58

27d ago55:58

55:58

If you’ve ever joked about “peeing just a little” when you sneeze, or you’re the kind of person who always has to know where the bathroom is, this one’s for you. Vanessa is sharing her personal (and super vulnerable) journey with bladder issues: how it started, the surprising symptoms, the anxiety it caused, and the expert-backed tools and tricks t…

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EPISODE 203: Is This Cheating? Part 2 1:09:28

1M ago1:09:28

1:09:28

Is it cheating if you go to sex club… but just to watch? What about a flirty Snapchat streak with your ex? A prostate massage with no orgasm? 👀 This week, we’re back with Part 2 of one of our most talked-about episodes. We asked our community to share the moments, confessions, and curveballs that made them ask, “Wait…is this cheating?” And let’s ju…

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EPISODE 202: Am I being defensive, or am I defending myself? 54:43

1M ago54:43

54:43

We’ve all had that moment — your partner brings something up, and suddenly you’re snapping back with a list of everything they did wrong. But wait… is that defensiveness, or are you just defending yourself? This week, we’re diving into one of the trickiest relationship dynamics out there: defensiveness. And we’re not just talking about it — we’re u…

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EPISODE 201: Couples Coaching Session: They Love Each Other… So Why Does Their Sex Life Feel Stuck? 1:03:46

2M ago1:03:46

1:03:46

🎙️ Welcome to our very first coaching episode! Ever feel stuck in your sex life — like you know things could be better but have no idea how to fix them? That’s exactly where today’s couple is. In this special, brand-new format, we’re coaching a real life couple, and diving deep into mismatched desire, stress, and the invisible walls keeping them fr…

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EPISODE 200: 200 Episodes Later: Let’s Get Personal! (Ask Us Anything) 1:14:44

2M ago1:14:44

1:14:44

🎉 We made it to 200 episodes! 🎉 It’s wild to think about how far this podcast has come. There’s one thing we know for sure… we couldn’t have come this far without YOU. That’s why for this very special episode, we decided to celebrate by letting you ask us… …absolutely ANYTHING. And you didn’t disappoint. From personal confessions to relationship de…

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EPISODE 199: Am I The Asshole? Masturbation, Snooping, and Jealousy 1:01:52

2M ago1:01:52

1:01:52

We’re back with a fan-favorite series—Am I The Asshole? 🎉 You know we love diving into the wildest relationship dilemmas, and today’s lineup is extra spicy. We’re tackling situations that might hit way too close to home, like: 🚨 Masturbating - do you have to tell your partner every time? 🚨 Journaling about a past relationship—cheating or harmless? …

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EPISODE 198: Stop Doing THIS If You Want More Sex (Initiation Fixes You Need to Know) 54:58

2M ago54:58

54:58

Initiating sex in your relationship should feel exciting, not frustrating—but let’s be real… for most couples, it’s anything but smooth. Whether you're feeling stuck, rejected, or just plain awkward when it comes to getting things started in the bedroom, today’s episode is here to help! We surveyed our audience, and only 17% of people said they’re …

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EPISODE 197: Ask A Sex Therapist - Resentment, Sexual Frustration, And The Death Grip 1:04:38

3M ago1:04:38

1:04:38

Ever wish you had a sex therapist on speed dial? We get so many questions every week (because you guys are THE BEST) that we just can’t get to them all—so today, we’re dedicating an entire episode to answering your biggest intimacy and relationship dilemmas. From navigating mismatched libidos to handling awkward bedroom moments, we’re here to break…

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EPISODE 196: 90 Prompts to Transform Your Sex Life (We Answer Some Live!) 1:00:32

3M ago1:00:32

1:00:32

🔥 Let’s talk about sex—but let’s make it fun, flirty, and way less awkward. In this episode, we’re telling you about 90 spicy prompts designed to get you talking, laughing, and maybe even blushing with your partner. We’ll be pulling cards from our brand-spankin-new Sex Talks Card Deck and answering them live, sharing our hottest takes, and reading …

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Episode 195: Giddyup, Cowgirl! Tips, Tricks, & Techniques For Maximum Pleasure 1:06:25

3M ago1:06:25

1:06:25

Cowgirl is one of the most empowering positions in the bedroom—so why do so many of us avoid it? 🤠 If you’ve ever felt awkward, unsure, or just plain tired when trying Cowgirl, this episode is for you! We’re breaking down everything you need to know to master this position with confidence—from why it’s one of the best for pleasure to how to move in…

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Episode 194: What Your Partner Wishes You’d Stop Doing In The Bedroom Part 2 1:13:13

3M ago1:13:13

1:13:13

Have you ever wondered if there’s something you do in the bedroom that your partner secretly (or not-so-secretly) wishes you’d stop doing? Well, you’re not alone. A while back, we asked our audience this very question, and the responses came flooding in. So many, in fact, that we had to bring this topic back for Part 2! In today’s episode, we’re di…

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Episode 193: The Things We Can’t Say In The Comments 1:08:30

3M ago1:08:30

1:08:30

Ever wonder what we really want to say when someone leaves a spicy comment on one of our social media posts? Well, you’re in for a treat. Social media has been an incredible way to connect with our community, share free resources, and help couples build their best relationships. But putting ourselves out there also means we encounter some… interest…

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Episode 192: “Is This Normal?” Part 4 — Low Desire Husband, Never Had A Fight, & Baby Talk 51:26

4M ago51:26

51:26

We’re diving into part 4 of one of our favorite series, “Is This Normal?” We’ll be exploring topics like: Is it normal for my husband to have absolutely no sex drive? Is it normal to never have fought? Is it normal for my partner to talk in a baby voice and for it to turn me off? And even more of your questions! This episode is packed with real tal…

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Episode 191: Breaking Free From Purity Culture And Religious Shame 1:07:59

4M ago1:07:59

1:07:59

If you were raised in Purity Culture, you already know how challenging it can be to overcome now that you’re an adult. You spent years being taught that it’s important for you to be wholesome, that pleasure is sinful, and that there are very specific rules you need to follow. In this episode, we’re sharing stories from people who were raised in Pur…

1
Episode 190: Am I Being Reasonable Or Ridiculous? 56:55

4M ago56:55

56:55

Have you ever wanted something from your partner, but found yourself wondering, “Am I asking too much?” Or has your partner ever asked you for something that didn’t feel reasonable to you? We asked our community to share some of their questionable relationship requests, and the responses were fascinating! Tune in as we break down the line between w…

1
Episode 189: Can We Have A Fresh Start? Or Is It Too Late? 53:35

4M ago53:35

53:35

It’s officially 2025 and you might be feeling like your relationship could use a fresh start. We asked our Instagram audience if they’ve ever wished for a fresh start in their relationship—and the responses came pouring in! We’re reading through your submissions, sharing our thoughts, and offering practical advice for anyone looking to refresh thei…

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Episode 188: Is Your Ultimatum Going To Work? 46:52

5M ago46:52

46:52

We were feeling inspired… The Ultimatum is back on Netflix, and it was wild. It left us wondering if our own audience has ever given (or been given) a relationship ultimatum, so we asked! In this episode, we’re breaking down your ultimatums and sharing our opinions and advice. If you’ve ever considered giving an ultimatum - or if you’re just curiou…

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Episode 187: Am I The Asshole? The Holiday Edition Part 2 1:08:03

5M ago1:08:03

1:08:03

Tis the Season for DRAMA! We’re so excited to bring you another hilarious “Am I The Asshole?” episode this week. In the theme of the season, we’re doing another holiday edition. We’re talking about affairs, secret Santa mishaps, and a disastrous salmon situation. Get ready to grab your coziest blanket and cup of cocoa for this new episode of one of…

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Episode 186: Period Sex, Internal Vs External Processors, & Queer In A Straight Relationship 59:14

5M ago59:14

59:14

There are a ton of topics we want to cover on this podcast, but sometimes we just don’t have enough material to make a full hour-long episode for each one. So we’re trying something new to give you our hottest takes and tips… a multi-topic episode! Today we’re talking about being non-hetero in a male-female relationship, period sex, and internal ve…

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Episode 185: How To Navigate Porn In Your Relationship 56:33

5M ago56:33

56:33

Today we’re tackling one of the trickiest and most controversial topics we get asked about - porn. Is it OK to watch porn even if you’re in a relationship? Can it become addicting? Can you forbid your partner from watching it? In this episode we cover how porn affects you personally, pros and cons to bringing porn into your relationship, and what t…

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Episode 184: How To Get More Physical Intimacy From Your Partner 57:47

6M ago57:47

57:47

Do you want more physical intimacy in your relationship? In this episode, we’re talking about different kinds of physical intimacy, why it’s so important, how to ask your partner for more, and what to do if you’re worried they won’t understand. Links & Resources: Challenge: Sweet Or Spicy If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your…

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Episode 183: How To Get More Emotional Intimacy From Your Partner 55:09

6M ago55:09

55:09

Do you want more emotional intimacy in your relationship? In today’s episode, we’re covering what emotional intimacy actually is, how to get more of it in your relationship, and even what to do if your partner doesn’t understand what you want. Links & Resources: Challenge: Sweet Or Spicy If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to subscribe for your …

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Episode 182: “Help! I’m Not Into My Partner’s Fantasy!” 1:02:35

6M ago1:02:35

1:02:35

What happens when you have a fantasy that your partner is just not into? When your “yum” is their “yuck” if you will. We asked our IG community for stories about times when their partner wanted to try something they weren’t into, or vice versa. Now, we’re sharing our best advice on how to handle the differences. Links & Resources: Sign up for our e…

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Episode 181: A Brutally Honest Relationship Check-In 1:04:37

6M ago1:04:37

1:04:37

How are we really doing? We had a plan to talk about a different topic, but once we sat down in front of the mics, we decided to go rogue and talk about what life has really been like recently. In today’s episode, we’re getting extra personal and sharing some of our ups and downs from the year so far. We’ve got details about all the tough decisions…

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Episode 180: Smash Or Pass: We Try The Weirdest Women’s Magazines Sex Tips 53:18

6M ago53:18

53:18

It’s time for another edition of one of our most popular series, Smash or Pass! This is where we try out the internet’s weirdest sex tips, so you don’t have to! (We even recorded audio of ourselves trying out a lot of the tips…) Today’s theme is sex tips from 90’s and 00’s women’s magazines. Do these tips about “driving your man wild” actually work…

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Episode 179: All Your Female Orgasm Questions: Answered! 1:00:23

7M ago1:00:23

1:00:23

What’s the difference between a clitoral orgasm, g-spot orgasm, and cervical orgasm? What’s squirting? How common is it for women to orgasm multiple times in 1 session? Today we’re taking it back to the very first topic Vanessa became known for - female orgasm (Buzzfeed even called her The Orgasm Whisperer)! In this episode, Vanessa is answering so…

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Episode 178: Tie-Breakers: We Solve Your Relationship Standoffs 1:11:11

7M ago1:11:11

1:11:11

We’re bringing one of our favorite Instagram games to the podcast, Tie-Breakers! We asked our community to share some of the things that they just can’t agree on with their partner. We break the tie for them! We’ve got some interesting relationship stand-offs to dig into for this episode, like who is responsible for chores if only one of you works,…

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Episode 177: Why You Should Try Mutual Masturbation And How To Do It 45:20

7M ago45:20

45:20

Mutual masturbation is one of the sexiest things you can do in the bedroom! But when we asked our audience if they had ever mutually masturbated with their partner, only 36% said yes. in today’s episode, we break down what mutual masturbation is, how to get comfortable and confident doing it, and how to take it to the next level! Links & Resources:…

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Episode 176: Is This Cheating? 1:00:44

7M ago1:00:44

1:00:44

Is it cheating to keep nudes from past relationships? Have an Only Fans account? Have a “work wife”? For this episode, we asked our community to tell us about a situation they’re in that has left them wondering, “Does this count as cheating?” The answers were fascinating, and we had a blast giving our hot takes. This is a great episode to listen to…

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Episode 175: “Should I Put Up With This In The Bedroom?” 1:06:05

8M ago1:06:05

1:06:05

Is there something your partner does in the bedroom that you’re not sure you should put up with? This episode was inspired by a message we got from a woman whose husband wears headphones and listens to podcasts while they have sex. She wanted to know if it was OK for her to be upset by this behavior. Minds blown, we turned to Instagram to ask peopl…

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Episode 174: Ask Us Anything: Addressing All Of Your Assumptions 1:02:22

8M ago1:02:22

1:02:22

Does Vanessa wear the pants in the relationship? Are we skipping out on meetings to have sex in the middle of the day? Are we rich?? It’s time for another round of Ask Us Anything, and we’re answering all your nosiest assumptions. We’re covering the most personal topics involving our relationship, our business, and even our sex lives. Links & Resou…

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Episode 173: I’m Attracted To Someone Else, What Do I Do? 1:06:35

8M ago1:06:35

1:06:35

Ever found yourself feeling attracted to someone else despite being in a committed monogamous relationship? Maybe someone cute you saw at the gym. Or a college. Or even your partner’s best friend?? Don’t worry, you aren’t the only one. Today we’re digging into real stories from our community about times they were attracted to someone else, and givi…

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Episode 172: Bring Sex Toys Into Your Bedroom (Without Making It Weird) 1:05:04

8M ago1:05:04

1:05:04

Have you wanted to bring a sex toy into the bedroom but been worried about your partner’s response? It can be a scary ask! Maybe you’re worried about hurting your partner’s feelings, maybe you don’t even own one yet. Well, we think sex toys can be an incredibly useful way to balance the orgasm gap and increase pleasure! So in this episode, we’re go…

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Episode 171: Your Funniest Stories About Getting “The Talk” 1:03:53

9M ago1:03:53

1:03:53

“When mommy and daddy lock the bedroom door…” We’ve all been there at some point in our childhood when someone sat us down and talked to us for the first time about sex. Odds are it was probably awkward, uncomfortable, and maybe left you with more questions than before. In this episode, we’re digging into all of your true stories about how “The Tal…

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Episode 170: What Do Women Really Think About ___? Part 2 59:51

9M ago59:51

59:51

We’re back with Part 2 of our “What Do Women Really Think About…?” series. We turned to our instagram community again and asked for a new batch of topics. We’re diving into women’s real thoughts about spitting vs swallowing, their partners watching porn, and some (pretty crazy) wild cards. Links & Resources: Ultimate Foreplay Guides Next Level Inte…

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Episode 169: Is This Your Shit Or Mine? Part 2 1:11:44

9M ago1:11:44

1:11:44

Ever had a frustrating situation with a partner that left you wondering, “Is this your problem to fix? Or mine?” Whether it’s disagreeing on parenting choices or your partner having a fetish that you’re not into yourself, it’s completely normal to be confused about who needs to make a change. Today we’re bringing back “Is This Your Shit Or Mine?” f…

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Episode 168: Long Distance? How To Keep The Spark Alive 54:51

9M ago54:51

54:51

Long distance relationships are hard! About 14 million people are in long distance relationships in the US alone, and most of them report struggling to keep the spark alive. In this episode, we’re going to help you stay connected and keep it spicy with hacks, techniques, tips, and tricks. Links & Resources: Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Wi…

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Episode 167: Should We Open Our Relationship? 1:06:12

10M ago1:06:12

1:06:12

Have you ever considered opening your relationship? Or just ever felt nosy about why other people open theirs? For today’s episode, we asked our Instagram audience to let us know if they were considering opening their relationship. We weigh in on what they should do and give them (and you!) our best advice. Links & Resources: Art Of Initiation If y…

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Episode 166: How To Create More Privacy For Sex 58:13

10M ago58:13

58:13

Does a lack of privacy get in the way of your sex life? You’re not alone. 62% of our audience say they wish they had more privacy, and 92% of them say they’d be having more and better sex if they had more privacy. If you don’t have privacy, you may find it difficult to get in the mood, relax in the moment, make any noise, or even allow yourself to …

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Episode 165: How To Actually Be Vulnerable With Your Partner 56:29

10M ago56:29

56:29

Did you know that only 24% of people said they’re happy with the level of vulnerability in their relationship? We asked our community why they struggle to be vulnerable, and heard things like: -I didn’t grow up being vulnerable, so I don’t know how to do it -We’ve been together for so long without being vulnerable; it would feel weird to try to sta…

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Episode 164: Why You Need To Flirt In Your Relationship And How To Do It 55:20

10M ago55:20

55:20

Your partner wants you to flirt with them more! But the majority of us feel like we don’t know HOW to flirt. It feels awkward or cheesy... Or we don’t know what our partner will actually like. Get your notebooks out because today we’re going to teach you how to flirt with your partner! We’ll cover why flirting is so important in long-term relations…

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Episode 163: Should We Have A Threesome? 58:42

10M ago58:42

58:42

Threesomes are one of the most common fantasies, but most of us feel completely clueless about how to actually make them happen! In today’s episode, we walk you through how to have your first one, and share some hot, hilarious, awkward, and horrible stories about other peoples’ threesomes. If you’ve ever wanted to have a threesome or just want to h…

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Episode 162: “Is This Normal?” Part 3 — More Questions You Never Dared To Ask Out Loud 58:33

11M ago58:33

58:33

Get ready for the highly anticipated third act to one of our most popular episodes yet - Is This Normal? You’ll get answers to questions like: Is it normal that my husband isn’t instantly turned on when he sees me naked? Is it normal to never have masturbated? Is it normal to get the ick from my husband whom I truly love? And so much more! Prepare …

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Episode 161: We’re In Couples Therapy - Ask Us Anything! 1:08:55

11M ago1:08:55

1:08:55

Today we’re getting ULTRA personal, and answering all your questions about our recent experience in couples therapy. Do we think therapy sometimes digs up stuff that wasn’t a problem? Do we ever hope our therapist takes our side? And of course, the big question that everyone wanted to know… WHY are we in couples therapy in the first place? (We got …

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Episode 160: These 4 Communication Mistakes Cause Breakups 58:22

11M ago58:22

58:22

Are these four communication mistakes ruining your relationship? In today’s episode we’re revealing the Four Horsemen. Researcher John Gottman discovered that these specific communication pitfalls could predict divorce with over 90% accuracy! We’re breaking down what they are, how to know if you’re doing them, and what to do to have better communic…

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Episode 159: “Why Do Guys Do This?” - Xander Explains Male Behavior Part 2 58:02

11M ago58:02

58:02

Xander’s back in the hot seat answering all your burning questions about male behavior! Why do guys mansplain? Why do they struggle to find things that are right in front of their faces? Why are men always initiating when we’re right in the middle of something like doing the dishes? Why can’t they ever be vulnerable? And what’s with the obsession o…

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Episode 158: Maybe It’s Not Low Libido… 50:02

12M ago50:02

50:02

When the spark dies off in a relationship, it’s really easy to blame it on libido. But is libido actually the problem? In this episode, we reveal the truth about sex drive and ask a big question, “does libido even matter?” Links & Resources: Ultimate Foreplay Guides Next Level Intercourse Art of Initiation Go to Zocdoc.com/pillow and download the Z…

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Xander Marin Qcode Podcasts

Podcasts Worth a Listen