Today I'm talking with Leah at Clear Creek Ranch Mom.

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00:00
You're listening to A Tiny Homestead, the podcast comprised entirely of conversations with homesteaders, cottage food producers, and crafters. I'm your host, Mary Lewis. Have you thought about being a cottage food producer? Or if you're a cottage food producer, have you thought about expanding it into a small business? Cottage Foodie Con is probably for you. You can find more information at cottagefoodiecon.com and if you use the code HOME15, you'll get 15 % off your registration costs.

00:29
And that price is valid through the end of November. So again, check out cottagefoodiecon.com. The tiny homestead is sponsored by uh cottagefoodiecon.com. Today I'm talking with Leah at Clear Creek Ranch in Nebraska. Good morning, Leah. How are you? Good morning, Mary. Always good to visit with you. Yes. And as I told you before we started, I love you. You are wonderful. uh

00:58
What's the weather like in Nebraska this morning? Oh, goodness. So if you didn't know, my first major in college was actually meteorology. I was planning to be a weather girl. And so I love to study the weather. It is foggy and dreary. I'm supposed to be 60 today, but if you follow the old wives' tales, I mean, I keep seeing these early foggy mornings, TNS up for precipitation in 90 days. I don't know. Winter has not arrived yet, but

01:27
It'll be interesting to see what ends up happening. We've had such a beautiful fall. We have here in Minnesota too. And I thought we were going to be looking at an early cold snap, but it's been gorgeous. And we had our first, um, Sneet. We call it Sneet here, snow and sleet mixed together. We had that three or four days ago and it did it early in the morning and then it was gone by noon. Nice.

01:54
It's been, it's been foggy here every morning for the last four mornings. So I don't know. This, this climate change thing is freaky. I don't really love it, but it's okay. We'll see how it goes. And honestly, my husband drives all over creation for his job. So the less ice and snow on the road, guess is better than more ice and snow on the road. story. Yep. Yeah. Let's check like in February and see how things are looking.

02:24
Yeah. Well, I'm sure we're going to get snow. I just don't think we're going to get a lot. The last two winters here where we live, we haven't even seen a foot of snow total for the winter. Yep. Same. I always uh judge the snow by in my diary how many times we had to scoot bunks for the feeder calves in the mornings. And the feeder calves are with us until, well, somewhere around the week after Valentine's Day when we usually sell them. so I always know what kind of winter it's.

02:53
It's been, we didn't have to shovel at all last winter at all. Okay. All right. So Leah's been a guest on this show three times already because she's brilliant and I love talking with her and she is a rancher, a fifth generation rancher, right? Yes, ma'am. And sixth generation waiting in the wings. Oh, there's a baby come in. uh No, the girls fight our daughters. Yep. Yep. Yep. The ranch will be left.

03:23
to these wonderful girls when the time is right and they can do with it as they choose. But I love that fact. Good. And hopefully they'll marry really good, strong, smart men who can help them run the ranch. Yes, ma'am. That is the prayer when I go to bed every night is marrying the right man, not because of what I want him to do, but how I want him to be no matter what occupation he's in.

03:53
Yes, absolutely. need, okay, I'm gonna step on the soap box for a minute because I don't usually, but I'm going to right now. We need our children who are adults to hook up with the right person so that they can have a really long and lasting love and that they work together as partners because I've been married three times. This current marriage is my third marriage and we just celebrated our 20 something.

04:22
I can't remember right now. I married in 2002. And it's longest marriage out of any of the three that I've had. And my husband and I are very different people. I mean, very different. His priorities and my priorities on things are very far apart sometimes, but our core values are the same. And so if you can find someone with the same core values, you can work through almost anything. Amen, sister. Yeah.

04:51
So um when we last talked in September, so this is a really quick turnaround for you to come back. I'm very happy about that. We talked about beef prices. And one of the things that you told me is that you guys were going to have to decide how many of the baby, ah well, not baby, but younger bovines you were going to keep back to build your inventory back up.

05:17
So how is that going? Have you decided? Have you already made the decision what's up with that? We were blessed with wonderful weather this fall and we weaned right on schedule and the weather was cooperative for that. Weaning is a stressful time for the calves mainly because they do lose that last bit of immunity benefit they're getting from their mother's milk even as most of them have tapered down. And we did deal with some wild temperature swings and when that happens right in that stressful period,

05:47
they can have some respiratory concerns. And we did see that, but thankfully our people, all of us, vigilant on top of that. And we got through the weaning stress just fine. And then we moved right into harvest and then we moved back to cattle work. And so the last two months since I talked with you really have been a blur. That's the way it is each year. Oh, to the news on beef, you know.

06:15
We could talk just for days and days about everything over the last 60 days regarding beef in the United States. insanity. uh Yeah. And so, you know, my father is a very wise man, still very involved in the operation. And he reminds me constantly something we talked about before we went on the air today about only managing what's in your sphere of influence and sphere of control. And that's a good touch point. And it's important.

06:45
to do often, more than once a day sometimes, as these sensational headlines and comments being made and swings on paper at least in the markets and global challenges continue that the wisest voices have said, focus on what you control, which is ranchers, please keep raising high quality beef.

07:10
So here we are now in mid-November and all of our feeder calves are growing away and we have not made decisions yet on how many females we will retain next year. Now we always raise our own, our own replacement heifers, but there may be an opportunity to hang onto a few more rather than set them into the feeder cattle market. Preg checking was last week for us. That went exceptionally well and we're very grateful because every cow

07:38
will hit a place in her life where it's time for her to exit the herd for whatever reason. Maybe she hasn't bred two years in a row. She's got cancer. She needs to go. Or maybe her last calf didn't wean off very well. Maybe she didn't have enough milk. So we're always anxious that we have a good quality crop of replacements, always ready to step in to that herd. Now we have finite resources as far as what we own for grass and the rent that we

08:08
do of grass, so we have to manage our grazing plans well, working with Mother Nature. But the bigger question that many producers have right now who are justified in their concerns about what an operating note is going to look like, maybe they raise other commodities that are in the dumpster, like corn and markets are right now, are going to have to work really closely with their bankers, with their accountants, with their insurance people.

08:38
and with their families and other decision makers and make real hard decisions about what the plans are next year and try to do it without being caught up in speculation because that doesn't serve a purpose. So for us, means keeping on keeping on. There may be an opportunity to keep back some additional females so we can do our part to try to help grow the herds.

09:07
size in America because it has continued to shrink. But that'll be a decision made in spring, probably.

09:16
It's really, really hard to explain what all this means to consumers or to those removed from agriculture, but it's not unlike owning and managing your own business, especially if it's a business that's really can be really caught up in things affecting you that you don't have any say over. That's the hardest part to translate as again evidenced by comments and wild swings in the markets. um

09:46
things happen at least on paper and on the boards that affect us, sometimes minute by minute. And I don't like it. I can't do anything about it except for ask my elected people to be cognizant of what we've allowed to happen. And so much of it is well beyond my limited understanding of economics um and trade. But.

10:15
Doing what's best for Americans, for consumers, for business owners, investors and all is very complicated. All I can say is there's a lot more that needs to be done again as evidenced by what's happened. mean, it was terrible a few weeks ago and I more than anything I think in this day and age of instant information, instant communications, it's every one of us needs to be much more cognizant.

10:44
of understanding the words have consequences. Good words and bad words, because you just travel so much more quickly and you don't get an opportunity to provide further explanation to what you're saying. People have got to take responsibility for the words and the impact that they have in all regards. And that goes for us in agriculture, those of us working in it, those of us leading these industries.

11:13
And to those who are supposed to be looking out for us, who maybe have never had had a pair of boots in their life, your words really do have meaning and consequences. So choose really wisely. absolutely. And the whole thing about not having control. It also impacts little, little farms like mine, because every time we see a report for the weather,

11:42
you know, for the week coming up in the summertime, we're like, okay, well, we could lose the entire garden a week from now because they're predicting really bad storms, really high winds, hail, blah, blah, blah. And every time that happens, I take a deep breath and I'm not really a religious girl, but I, I phrase it as the universe, not God. And I say, universe, please don't take my garden right now. And we've been lucky. It hasn't taken our garden, but at some point,

12:11
the weather will take our garden. And so you just, I don't know, you gotta have faith in something, whether it's God or yourself or whatever, that as long as you're breathing and capable, there's always potential. Yes. And your words do have consequences. Your actions have consequences and sometimes things just happen. Yeah.

12:40
We want so badly to have blame placed or responsibility assigned to everything. And I mean everything. And that's not good for us. It's not healthy. The thing I appreciate about America's ranchers, I'm just, I'm going to, I'm going to say ranchers, but really mean throw, I'm throwing that blanket over people who raise a living thing, who are responsible for a living thing, whatever it might be. They understand.

13:10
they have to or they won't survive. Sometimes things just happen. So you try to plan for it. You try to make sure you have insurance, you know, for it. But sometimes things just happen and there aren't any answers and there aren't fixes. They're just not. And when those things come, for me personally, I have to rely on my faith and I have to rely on

13:36
Believing, choosing to believe that other human beings are good. They care about the wellbeing of others, even if others look different than them. And that there is enough goodwill to get people through those things. um If we don't have that, and that's why I'm so passionate about community, if we don't have that, we all would fold because stuff just happens. Yep, I have a couple things on that. Number one,

14:05
It's okay to have a damn good cry when stuff happens. Yes. And it's good for you. You know, it's better than crawling into a bottle of alcohol or I don't know, smoke in a joint. And I'm not saying that marijuana is bad. There's a lot of stuff in the news and among people right now that marijuana is not any more harmful than alcohol. I have never done a street drug in my life. Don't intend to. am

14:34
way too much of a control freak to let go that far. sometimes feeling your feelings and just having a really good cry or a huge giggle fit is good for the soul. So do that first. And I was going somewhere with this and I think I lost my train of thought because that happens too. You can't judge people. You should not be judging people's response to things happening either. I am right.

15:03
really, really hard on women on this one, because I've seen it a lot recently where women are judging one another's response and grief, whatever the grief is over, that that is a dangerous thing to do, because it doesn't look the same for everyone ever, and it never will. No, no, it does not. And it changes for the same person. When we first moved here, five years ago, we got

15:31
a couple of cats from the Humane Society to be barn cats. And they were gorgeous. They were like six or eight months old and they were males. They were fixed. One was a silver tabby. One was an orange tabby. And within six months, the silver tabby got hit by a car. And it was the first animal we'd lost here since we moved here. And I sobbed. Like I was really, really upset.

15:58
And my husband said, you're going to have to get uh a stiffer upper lip, honey, because things die on the farm. And I was like, I don't have to do anything. I have to cry right now. And he said, okay. He said, it's going to hurt every time. And I said, yes, this is the worst one. Let me feel it. And he was like, I just hate it when you're upset. And I said, yeah, no, I know you love me. You want me to be happy. I understand. And so I, I felt my feelings that day. I slammed cabinet doors. I.

16:27
did dishes and swept the floor and threw all my sadness and my disappointment into cleaning because that's what we women tend to do, you know, a lot. And then a year later, the orange one got hit by a car. We live on a really busy highway. And I saw him in the road and I knew he was dead. And I was like, well, I know where the cat is. And my husband said, where? I said, look, cause we'd see him out the window. And he said, oh no, are you going to cry all day? And I was like, nope.

16:57
I'm not, I'm gonna slam cabinets and clean my house." And he just laughed and he said, oh, he said, so you were right. The first one was really hard. It's gonna get easier. It's just never gonna be any fun. And I said, yeah. So even your grief process changes from one day to the next because you never get over losing something to death. You just get used to it, which sounds terrible, but it's true. It is true. And

17:27
I'm so thankful for my tenure in the past as a government employee. I'm thankful for it for many reasons. When October 1st came, not long after you and I had talked.

17:40
and government shutdown happened. I was so thankful for my experience as a government employee because it helped bolster my empathy for those affected, including myself a second time, but also to be a voice and push back against those who could not seemingly find their compassion or empathy for those affected by the decisions made. And

18:09
I don't love looking for a fight. I don't. And I don't like arguing. really prefer peace. The older I get, the more I crave it. And yet there's this piece of me that says, you know, thank God made you for a reason to be an advocate for people who feel like they don't have a voice. So I found myself doing exactly what you're talking about in helping people, trying to help people see.

18:36
When you don't know how someone's feeling or how something affects someone, you don't have the right to tell them how they should feel about it.

18:51
And I don't know if I made an impression or not, but the second time that someone just said something like, well, you'll get your pay when the government's back open, I'm sure you have an emergency fund.

19:06
doesn't help. you know, I don't know enough about other cultures to know if this kind of self-righteous, all-knowing behavior exists in other cultures the way it does in this country. But it's not a good look for us, and it's really, really left me thoughtful, especially in recent months, about how we conduct ourselves and how we think we are, all knowing about how everyone should think or feel or act at any time.

19:33
Yeah, and I have to be really careful with my podcast about this stuff because I think the way that we do things at our house is good. I think it's the right way to do things. It may not be right for everybody else. Yes, and we need diversity. That's what makes our country so great. Yeah, and I actually talked to two different people oh in the last two weeks for the podcast about the whole SNAP.

20:03
benefits fiasco because the first one was about how to find help and how to be a helper in that situation and then the second one was how to not find yourself in a bind if if something like that happens again how can you prepare for that ahead of time and I almost didn't do either one of them because I was like well who am I to say anything about this I have food in my freezers and in my pantry because

20:32
That's how we operate here. We plan for a month ahead at least, because it's how we've always done it. Who am I to tell anybody how to do anything? And then I was like, but that's how we survive our winters, because if we can't get out for a week, because we're iced in or snowed in, we're prepared. So I did. I talked to people and I shared what I knew. And our state, Leah, honest to God,

21:00
I grew up in Maine. I didn't not want to leave Maine ever. And my first husband decided to take a job in Minnesota back when we were together for, we were married for a couple of years at that point. And I was kicking and screaming to not go, but my parents raised me that if you marry somebody, you go with them. Should have divorced him then, but didn't do it. But, uh, this state that I have come to call home is so good. Um,

21:29
whole bunch of restaurants put out the information that if you are hungry, we will feed you no questions asked during this whole snap thing. And I couldn't, they didn't have to do that. And I know it's a really good public relations thing, but they didn't have to do that. And the food shelves just banded together and basically were ready to do whatever they could to help people.

21:59
I'm just so impressed with my state and I don't know if other states have been that good about it, but I just, love the state that I ended up having to move to. Those wonderful stories have been told in many spaces and a couple of things that, you wish you didn't have to ask, ask for people to do good for one another when they can. Um, in my, how I was raised, that that's, that was a commandment given, um,

22:30
from biblical times m to do that, to be that for one another and the expectation and yet we need more of those positive stories. And again, when you get away from sensational headlines and TikTok videos that went viral of people saying and being stupid, underneath of that was the superior majority of people just doing good for one another and being the helper. And thank God for that. Yes. I don't want to be that extreme.

22:59
And people have to set that crap down because it's also not good for your own inner peace and your mind. You have to learn how to filter what you're taking in. It's too much, too much information any day. You've got people need to be more discerning and stop idly just scrolling. Yes. And the thing, the thing about scrolling is that the algorithm feeds you more of what you actually want.

23:27
what you're telling it you want. And for me, I want education. And so my Facebook feed is full of things like your, your page, Facebook page, and many, many others like you who are trying to educate, who are trying to help who are trying to share. And so I love my Facebook feed because it actually lifts me up, which is great. uh

23:55
When I feel like the algorithms get messed up, I start whispering things. I got that idea from a hilarious woman I follow in Colorado. She whispers to her phone often like, baby otters, happy cows, puppies listening. Cute kittens, cute puppies. exactly. Keep garbage away. Yeah, exactly.

24:23
I just, I have the news on as background during the day because my dog is not happy unless the TV's on. Her name is Maggie, by the way, and I didn't realize that your daughter's name was Maggie. I realized that the other day. with the news on during the day, if something happens, I know about it immediately. And it used to just make my heart skip a beat and I'd be like, what happened now?

24:49
Now when there's the breaking news music that every news station has, I'm like, okay, what happened now? And I read the little ticker at the bottom. I'm like, oh, nothing I need to worry about. And volume goes back down. I just keep doing what I was doing because it is too much. It's constant feedback. Yeah. There's one outlier that has, and I can't decide. I wish my grandma were still alive to help me talk through it.

25:18
And it's the whole conversation about AI. I have not been able to discern that I can leave it alone and set it down and just be aware of what's happening or do I need to become more vigilant and more outspoken and be doing something because I don't trust those who have the power in their hands. Which obviously like many other things in history has all been about who has the money and influence and that's not a good look. But.

25:46
It's been hard for me to set that one down, I believe. Yes, and the thing that I keep hearing from people who are concerned about AI but not afraid of it is just keep being human. If you're a human, be human because AI can't be human. As long as AI doesn't gain the ability to out-human us in its own way.

26:14
I hope that doesn't happen, but in the meantime, keep being you. Because there's only one you. You're the only person who can be you and show yourself to the world as being human. Yeah, online arguments going on this morning. I was pleased when I did see that one woman had evidently used chat GPT to help her put her argument together. uh

26:41
And she was called out on that and said, if you want to debate this, you do it. You don't be going to.

26:49
other forums like that. That's not right and it's not fair. This is a human to human conversation and had to do with safety for incoming college students on campus. I don't want chat GPT to decide. I want to go with my gut. The questions I ask and the experiences I have. I'm not going to use chat GPT to tell me if this campus is safe for my child. Yeah, and and the other thing is is that I don't want to say this, but I'm going to say it anyway.

27:17
No place that is public is safe anymore on any given day, which is a terrible, horrible thing to say, but it's true. ah A year or so ago, it might've been three years ago. don't know. Time is wimbly-wombly here on the farm because there's no real schedule. We just do the chores and do the things we do. And we're not really aware of calendars as it were. a couple of years ago,

27:46
My husband worked for a different company and he traveled to places then too, because he's a tech and he was at a clinic in Buffalo, Minnesota, not an hour before it was shot up. He was out of there before it happened. And it was in the town where my second ex-husband and our son live. And I was shook. I could, I could have lost.

28:14
my kid, I could have lost my husband or my former husband if they had been in that area. And I was like, is no place safe anymore? And the answer was no, no place is safe anymore. So asking if a college campus is safe for whatever reason is kind of a dumb question. Yeah. And as you said,

28:43
depends on all of us remaining and choosing to be human and how we look at others. exactly. Exactly. And it's really hard sometimes. Sometimes you look at people and you just know that it's not going to go well. The conversation is just not going to go well. And I am one of those people who will try. You know, I always stick out my hand and say, it's nice to meet you. Tell me about yourself.

29:12
I know within five minutes if I'm ever going to want to hang out with that person again, because it just depends on how they react to that one first interaction. Absolutely. Yes. So, so, I have a question for you. You were off work because of the shutdown, right?

29:33
I was considered rolled back in my hours because our little nonprofit is funded by various federal grants and some were frozen and some were not frozen during shutdown. So we did for a little people and then we partially furloughed other people like myself um for the duration of that because being a small nonprofit without other sources of income, we didn't have the funding to keep doing our work without that program support.

30:03
Okay. So was that, it doesn't sound weird. Was it sort of a blessing in disguise because you guys had so much going on at the ranch? Yeah. The blessing and very freeing Mary because it helped fix my vision a little bit. So my vision, my personal vision on some things and being a part of what's called that sandwich generation, though the women and particularly wedged in the middle as their parents age.

30:33
They themselves are aging and they're still raising children. The pinch that I had been feeling, feeling that it was time to make some changes and truly step out in faith because who wants to abandon a paycheck? And so near the, before the shutdown ended, I did put my resignation in to the nonprofit, not because I want to abandon the work. It's really important work.

30:59
But because of my reality of being a woman in the sandwich, that they need someone else um to pick up the reins, so to speak, right now, because I have to choose differently for the next period of months. And that means being a present and focused mother of a senior in high school, being a present and focused daughter and business partner to the operations on this ranch, and frankly, taking better care of myself.

31:30
I am so proud of you.

31:35
It's difficult, Mary, because I'm so blessed with the way I was raised as a woman to work in what would have been considered a traditional way, but also very non-traditional. I love to be an irritator sometimes. People love to make assumptions about me because I'm a white woman living on a ranch. We have fun with it. But so thankful to be raised to think through things.

32:04
really think through things and evaluate them and not get caught up in like expectations and traditions. But also realistically that I am a money worrier, you know, so that's always in the back of your mind. But, um making this decision and being able to be vulnerable about it in front of my 17 year old who may find herself one day walking that tight rope that women walk with so many decisions to be made.

32:33
not to tell her that I made the right decision, but to empower her to be able to make decisions for herself. and that's a really good distinction in the difference there. uh No, seriously, proud of you. That's a hard choice and really brave. So when I say I'm proud of you, I mean it with everything I have in me. Thank you, Mary. There are so many women who have to make

33:01
hard decisions every single day. again, this back to the sandwich reference that many, many, many, many, many women find themselves in right now that when you feel the pinch from both sides and you recognize that you're so pinched that you're not taking care of yourself, that that serves nobody. If you're not taking care of yourself, you can't take care of either side of the sandwich either. Mm hmm. Yeah, for sure.

33:30
If you're not strong and you're not balanced in yourself, you cannot be that for anyone else. And I get it. It's a really difficult spot to be in. um I am really fortunate because my folks live in Maine and I have a younger sister and she's the one that decided she was going to stay in Maine and she lives like a couple miles from my parents now. And I know that if something's going on, she is there.

33:59
And that's the choice that she has made because I live too far away to be of any help in any kind of reasonable amount of time. And my kids, my oldest is 36 and my youngest is going to be 24 in December. And the youngest still lives with us. So I know what he's doing, but the other three are out on their own doing their thing. I think we raised them well enough that they are very self-sufficient.

34:28
Self-sufficient to the point that the one who lives in Nebraska comes back at least three times a year and helps his dad on this little farm and loves every minute of it. So I'm not quite as caught in that sandwich as you're talking about because I'm too far away from my parents to really help. And I'm kind of too far away from my kids in their ages to have to help. They're really good on their own. So I am so fortunate

34:57
to be in the position that I'm in and I damn well know it.

35:03
Yeah, it's definitely unique. There's not a lot written or said of it. I think it's because the women who are feeling it probably don't have time to talk about it a lot. They just do one day to the next. But I recognized I wanted to be fully present for my daughter as she visits colleges and applies for scholarships and makes decisions, not because I want to helicopter her into making the decisions I want her to make, but so that I'm available and I'm present.

35:31
And that my mind is clear enough to be available to her to help her. And then we will find our new normal when she leaves us and then we'll see and reevaluate at that time. um And our youngest, of course, will still be at home for a long time yet. So we'll see. I have been able to say yes to some opportunities after giving that notice. And I'll be wrapping up there here in the next few weeks. But say yes to some exciting opportunities in 2026 that I wouldn't have if I hadn't said.

36:00
said that it was time for this other tenure to end. Fantastic. I can't wait to find out what you're going to be working on. And you're also in that really weird spot of your first child becoming a fully fledged adult with her own life. And that is so exciting. And it's so sad at the same time. It's so exciting. the sadness is because it just went so fast. I know.

36:30
I'm going to cry for you. When I had my daughter, I was 10 days past 20 years old. I was a very young mom. And when they put her in my hands, was like, holy cow, 18 years is a long time. And the day she turned 18, I was like, oh, no, it's not. It's a blink of an eye. now that she's 36, I'm just like, wow. How did this happen?

37:00
You know, and I read this interesting talk last night about how kids of the 80s, you know, raise themselves and today we're so hyper focused on making sure we're trying to not make any missteps with parenting our kids. And I would say I landed somewhere in the middle. My parents were very intentional with trying to teach us the.

37:20
the rules of life and being prepared and whatnot. And when our daughter had a flat tire unexpectedly 60 miles down the road during harvest season and neither parents could go help her. She thought to call her parents and we talked through what she already knew, which was problem solving and how to overcome. And she did great. And yet as she's driving home and I'm worrying that she didn't get the lug nuts tightened enough. um

37:50
thinking she's about to go. Have we done everything we were supposed to do? Have we checked all the boxes yet? And I don't know if my parents thought about those things when I flew the coop. You know, have we helped her check all the boxes on how to stay alive and thrive? But I find myself thinking about it often. ah And it's important to me. And I think it speaks well because we're very

38:18
We're very open. She and I can talk about anything and disagree about anything um that makes me feel better. But yes, it is, like I said, when you're in this pinchy place and you're trying to think clearly, removing distractions is important. I know I speak from a place of privilege and saying that not every woman can decide to quit her job.

38:42
without having a backup plan. And believe me, as a child of the farm crisis in 1985, of course I have backup plans. it is important. It's just so important to be present. And if that means putting your phone down or whatever it is, parents have got to be present. I feel passionately about that. Yes. And I'm going to say another unpopular thing because apparently that's my thing today.

39:12
I feel like the women who are in their mid-20s to early 30s right now who are having kids, I feel like some of them are up a creek without a paddle when it comes to parenting because I feel like a lot of people didn't parent their kids in that spot. Yes, ma'am. And I don't know if I'm right or wrong on that, but... You're right. By the feedback I'm hearing constantly from young ladies who got a...

39:41
college degree and know nothing about taking care of their home. Yeah. And I did not enjoy the fact that my mom and dad had me and my sister doing dishes by the time we were like eight years old after dinner. I didn't really want to wash the dishes. I didn't really want to dry the dishes. I wanted to throw dishes in the trash and buy new dishes. That's what I wanted to do, but that's not a really sustainable way to do it.

40:06
I was doing dishes at eight years old and I tried to always wash the dishes because that was better than drying for me. And we were helping take the split wood to the bulkhead to the basement of our house and throw that wood down the stairs. And then once that bulkhead was full, going back in through the house and moving the wood from the bottom of the stairs to the other corner of the basement for the wood stove. Okay. I didn't really enjoy that either, but.

40:34
As an adult, I'm really glad that my parents were like, no, you are part of this family. And part of being this family is being part of the work of the family. And somewhere along the way, I feel like that has gotten lost because number one, there's not as much work to do unless you live that way. But also when realtors tell me that people say, well, I don't have a kitchen table. don't need, I don't need space for a kitchen table.

41:02
That speaks volumes about what you're just talking about, the illustration of that family unit, whoever's in your family, not having those touch points and connections frequently, regularly, where you do exactly what you're talking about. And so we raised them to be smart by our definitions and capable of earning a great income.

41:30
but the realities of life, all of that got glossed over in chasing titles and income and all of that's important. I'm not dissing on any of that. when I have women say, but I don't know how to make a grocery list. I don't know how to look at the ad and put a meal together. I don't know how to balance my checkbook. I don't know how to think beyond the present or I have my phone. What else do I need?

42:00
Uh-huh. It's a very scary, dangerous place to be in. You're right. Now these women and men are the parents and they're little people. And part of that is the effort, the chase of, don't want my kid to hurt and fail and be left out and lose. And I understand all of that. Oh, do I understand it? But I so appreciate it on a college visit, this really, really wonderful, empathetic nursing advisor saying to my daughter, have you ever received?

42:30
a B, Maggie. And Maggie said, no. And she said, I'm telling you right now, you're going to get a B, Maggie. You may get a C, a D, or an F. And your job is going to be to develop the resiliency and find the resources to here to move beyond it. You have to.

42:55
because they're seeing such a surge of young people who get their first B and they throw up their hands. Because everything's just been managed and curated for them so that they didn't fail. Yeah, and that's so wrong because if you don't fail, you don't learn. oh I just, it's so frustrating to me and I'm not gonna, I'm not, I swear to God, I'm not going on a tangent about this. I'm not, Mary Evelyn, no.

43:25
It's so frustrating to be a child of the eighties as it were. was born in 1969. I barely remember the seventies because I was just a little kid, but the eighties I remember. And the eighties seemed like just a golden time to be a teenager. And I look at how things are now. I wouldn't want to be a teenager in this day and age. Can you imagine how difficult it would be?

43:55
and everything of your life being documented and potentially put on social media where it could ruin you in 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 years? Oh, I would not. I would not. Knowing the teenager that I was, if I was that teenager now, I would have killed myself because I was bullied. I was teased. I stuck my foot in my mouth more times than I can count. And you know, it would have been caught on video and posted to Facebook or TikTok or whatever.

44:25
And I was not the kind of child who would have had the resiliency to live through that. I know that about myself. And there are so many kids bullied through social media that I just want to shake their parents and be like, what are you doing? It can't do that. Right. And so we raise them to do their best to make things right when they've done a wrong.

44:53
to ask for forgiveness, to offer grace. Like that is the way you're supposed to raise your people. But now, and again, you and I would enjoy some political conversations today. I laugh, right?

45:09
Let's just talk about this week's news and what's being released for consumption to the public. The misdeeds of this man. Horrible creature, Horrible, inexcusable, despicable, disgusting behavior. And caught up in this narrative, this is new news. Americans today in 2025, at what your elected people are doing. Look at their terrible

45:38
terrible behaviors. Can you imagine if social media had existed at the inception of this country? uh Dare I say that if any former president of this country had had social media and had participated in it, would any of them been elected? Any of them? Uh huh. Like, this kind of human behavior has existed since the beginning of time. It's just now we have the evidence. We have the proof, right?

46:07
Like there's journal stories about JFK and all the way back to Thomas Jefferson if you want, but we don't have the volume information today that has convinced us that this behavior has just all started. You know, it's trending now. uh People have made mistakes forever. Yeah, we just didn't know about them. That's all. Every freaking waking moment of the day. uh was, I'm gonna, I'm gonna.

46:35
I'm going to shift this just a little bit because I feel like this was a very good airing of feelings, but I want to go back to the fact that the government shutdown was 41 days long. And what I took away from that, because I already had it in my pocket, is that we really do need to have a local community of people who we love and trust and who we can help and who can help us.

47:02
I am the worst at this because we moved here five years ago. I've made like two friends in five years because we literally have neighbors who are a quarter mile away. And when you live in the country, you don't just go knock on somebody's door in the middle of COVID when we moved here and be like, hi, I brought you cookies. We live over here. Who are you? Because that would have been not really well received. And I did not want to take a chance on bringing

47:31
sickness to somebody's house or getting it from them in 2020, that seemed like a bad plan. But my husband sells things at the farmer's market in the summer and he's there every Saturday morning. So he has formed community and I'm all good with that because he and the people he's met, they all grow things and sell things that are different. So in our situation here, we do have a little community of people who are producers

48:00
who do want to help their community. And what I think that people probably should take out of this government shutdown is that we shouldn't solely rely on the government to help us. We need to help ourselves. We need to have a community of people who we can help as well. And so I'm guessing that you agree with that, but if you don't, feel free to disagree with me and tell me why. I do, Mary. And the pushback

48:31
is we have to stop being a nation afraid of one another, afraid of inconveniencing, afraid of asking, and then afraid of just showing up to be the hands and feet we need to be. We love to be called like these independent people, don't need anybody, but that's not true.

48:57
And historically speaking, it is community that has helped people truly make it through the worst and the hardest of times. can't even begin to tell you the stories I could share of the resiliency of community and how the women, give, just talking about women. The women are the only ones who got my community through World War II because the work had to keep going. So what were they forced to do?

49:24
to rely on community to help each other in the field, looking after the little people while the mama was out doing whatever needed to be done. We have to get back to community. And community means everybody provides and gives something, and maybe this isn't your season of giving, but next season is yours, and I'm not talking just about money. We have to. A united, community-focused country cannot be divided.

49:53
And the division we have today is because we don't have community. That's my feeling. I will die on that hill. I worked in the Nebraska legislature in college and I learned a lot. This is pre-9-11 and we have a unicameral legislature, Mary, where your party is not part of who you are. You can gather by how someone votes, maybe what party they...

50:21
affiliate with, but that's not what we do. And my memories were the man touted as the most liberal and difficult in the legislature, walking down the hall, coming around the corner and plopping down in the office of my Senator, whose wife was dying of cancer, to check in with him, to talk about the day's proceedings, to talk through and sometimes disagree, but they were not ugly to each other.

50:52
ever. And if you have community and you're actually looking and talking and sitting elbow to elbow with people.

51:04
You're not nearly as inclined to be ugly as what we see today. So helping each other, talking through our differences, finding consensus, because I'm not saying we're all going to agree, but consensus means you're willing to be respectful of another person's feeling or decision or have to go along with something. We have to, we have to get community back or we won't. We won't save our country without it. That's my opinion. We can't save it without it. Yep.

51:33
Absolutely. And that's again, part of the reason I started the podcast, because I needed a community of people that I could talk with and whether they agree with me or not. I learn a lot from people who disagree with me because sometimes I haven't considered the point of view because it's never been presented to me in the first place. yeah, it makes me stop and go, okay, now I understand where that comes from. And honestly,

52:01
One of the hardest things for me to get to, and it took me until I was probably in my late 30s or early 30s, is that people become who they become because of their experiences. I said that really wrong, but I was trying. Whatever has happened to them in the past forms who they become in the future. And when somebody seems really mean or evil to me, now my first thought is,

52:31
why are they the way they are, not I don't like them, because I want to understand what brought them to what they think and what they believe and what they feel. And being able to understand it helps me accept that that's who they are. Does that make sense? Yes. Okay. and people easily misunderstood if you don't get to know them. Yeah.

52:57
Sometimes there's no fixing the thing that's wrong with the person and I'm, I'm going to talk real roundabout about this. There is someone who is no longer in my life who has real big issues and they have perpetuated throughout that person's life. And I know why I know the story behind it still has not gotten through that still has not learned how to be a good human and

53:26
Good human to me may be different than good human to anyone else, but someone who respects people, who lets them have their own autonomy, does not gaslight them, things like that, okay? I understand why this person is the way that they are. I do not understand why therapy and seeing how other people behave hasn't brought them along to being, in my opinion, a good human.

53:53
I can't control that, it is not my place to tell them how to be. But being able to understand why they are the way they are has made it so much easier for me as a human. And that speaks to my heart so clearly because in my defense of agriculture, so easy to be caught up in like what my lens is like and the crops I raise and what I do. The great divide between us and consumers.

54:24
is because there isn't enough back and forth speaking with each other. And I don't know why that happened because I remember so clearly my mother shopping for groceries and shaking her head on occasion about, you know, a price jump in eggs, for instance, shaking her head, setting them some things down because it didn't fit in the budget, maybe wondering out loud about why something was more expensive. But I don't remember her ever blaming the farmer for it ever. And maybe because of who we are.

54:53
But this great divide between us and consumers and this, again, this thing about placing blame or we don't trust you, you know, you're trying to kill us or sicken us with what you're doing is because there's not enough community and not enough talking and effort just to try to understand, even if you don't agree, but just to try to understand. exactly. We all need to be better listeners, better tellers.

55:20
Because telling the truth is a big thing here too, in this whole community thing. And we need to be able to be around other humans and have compassion and patience. And I hate this part of this conversation because I always feel like Pollyanna, everything's great. If we would just be nicer to each other, the world would be a better place. And that is true. But it's not just being nicer. It's about being more patient and more understanding.

55:49
not just about being nice. And being willing to invest oneself in some of that self help, which is finding facts, finding accuracy, doing your own research and not just buying into the hype and the trends and the sensation, which makes you think one way or another, but asking more of yourself to be invested in what is fact. Digging deeper. Yeah.

56:19
Yeah, absolutely. enough. is just, I could go on for days, just not enough of that and wanting to be spoon fed everything instead of.

56:30
instead of

56:32
acting independently and wanting to validate and verify things because it matters, whatever it is, it does matter. Now you can say some act on faith. Yes, that's an important part of my life. But when it comes to making decisions about how to live and what to do and where to go and what to buy, it really, I'm not gonna ask others to do all that heavy lifting for me. I've gotta be invested in that. Well, that's why I asked you to be on the podcast back in September about the beef prices.

57:02
I knew that you knew facts that I didn't know. And I was like, I need someone who's more expert in this than I am. And I so appreciate you for that. And I appreciate you for chatting with me today. And we're almost in an hour. So I'm going to wrap this up because I didn't mean to take this much of your time today, Leah. Thank you so much for being here. where can people find you? You can find me at Clear Creek Ranch mom on Facebook and Instagram. And I.

57:32
What is ahead of me in 2026 is taking my show on the road, Mary. I've been invited to be a speaker um across the country in a few different venues. I'm really excited about the opportunity. And my message is going to be very simple. It's all going to be about how to help advocate for agriculture, whether you're growing hazelnuts or chickens or beef or cranberries or pumpkins or great. uh

58:02
any row crop, how to best advocate for our industry and do it with compassion and empathy and an open mind so that we can better bridge these gaps between us. Congratulations. I knew that was going to happen. I knew you were going to end up doing speaking. I'm anxious and excited all at the same time because I challenged myself to go in front of audiences I've never been in front of before with people.

58:31
who love their lives as much as I love mine in a completely different way. Awesome, awesome. I'm so happy for you. I'm so proud of you. I love you. You're fantastic. Thank you. That's not what my senior says who has to be harping on her about scholarship deadlines. That's because you're her mom. You're not my mom. uh

58:56
As always, people can find me at a tinyhomesteadpodcast.com. And if you'd like to support the podcast, you can go to a tinyhomestead.com slash support. ah Leah, I can't say it enough. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I appreciate you so much. Mary, keep up the good work. The world needs your stories and your voice in helping others tell their stories. I'm going to talk till I'm dead. That's what my dad told me.

59:25
I so love that you're from Maine because I have a dear friend here in Nebraska whose daughter bravely put on her boots and packed her bags and she's a student in Maine in college. A fish out of water but she's there because of the educational opportunities she was looking for and it has been an adventure. I hope that the Maynards have been nice to her and embraced her because New England folk have this uh

59:54
I don't know, this reputation for being very standoffish and not very nice and being very blunt. And that was not my experience growing up. all right, Leah, I hope you have a fantastic day. Thank you again. Thank you for taking the time with me, Mary. Appreciate it. You too. All right. Bye. Bye.