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Carrying Grief Forward Doesn't Mean Leaving Love Behind
Manage episode 476320557 series 2944741
Award-winning journalist Dina Gachman takes us on a profound journey through the landscape of loss, sharing how the deaths of her mother from cancer and sister from alcoholism transformed her understanding of grief. With remarkable candor, Dina reveals the unexpected realities of home hospice care—administering morphine every few hours with minimal professional support, experiencing moments of dark humor amidst heartbreak, and feeling the conflicting emotions of not wanting a loved one to die while being exhausted by their prolonged suffering.
The conversation explores the concept of "ambiguous loss"—grief experienced not from death but from relationship changes—which Dina encountered during her sister's years-long battle with alcoholism. She articulates how this differs from the anticipatory grief she felt watching her mother's cancer progress, offering valuable insights for anyone navigating complex family relationships affected by addiction or illness.
Most powerfully, Dina challenges the common misconception that grief follows five neat stages before we "move on." Instead, she describes learning to integrate grief permanently into her life: "I'm now a person forevermore that carries grief with me every single day, but I have a ton of joy." This reframing offers tremendous hope to listeners feeling overwhelmed by loss, demonstrating how we can honor our departed loved ones while still embracing happiness.
Dina's book "So Sorry for Your Loss" emerged from recognizing how uncomfortable most people are discussing grief. She combines personal memoir with journalistic exploration of topics like pet loss, hospice care, and the connection between food and mourning. Her work reminds us that acknowledging grief openly doesn't diminish joy—it creates space for authentic healing and deeper connection with both the living and those we've lost.
Links to “Bereaved But Still Me” Social Media and Podcast Pages:
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Chapters
1. Carrying Grief Forward Doesn't Mean Leaving Love Behind (00:00:00)
2. Introduction to Host and Guest (00:00:47)
3. Mother's Cancer Diagnosis and Family Hope (00:02:09)
4. The Hospice Experience (00:04:16)
5. Announcement and Disclaimer (00:10:10)
6. Sister Jackie's Struggle with Alcoholism (00:10:56)
7. Understanding Ambiguous Loss (00:17:37)
8. Finding Joy Amid Grief (00:21:31)
9. Writing About Grief and Loss (00:27:35)
10. Closing Thoughts and Resources (00:28:48)
106 episodes
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