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#42: Emotional Strength Isn’t Built by Crushing Your Feelings
Manage episode 491086504 series 2933996
The trickiest part about healing your inner world is learning to figure out the difference between self-help schticks and true healing. They are often confused with each other - especially by high achievers.
And the cost you pay for mixing them up is hefty.
Like, for example:
* Striving for more and more success even when it feels empty
* Sabotaging your relationships at home and at work
* Developing a severe case of burnout, numbness, and depression
And worst of all:
* Tricking yourself into thinking you’re growing when you’re really building more emotional armor that will forever keep deep fulfillment from your grasp.
Here’s the truth: More productivity hacks, more pressure, and more control won’t help you integrate. It’s a form of suffocation for parts you label as bad or weak or needy. But they don’t disappear, they wait until you're at your most vulnerable, then they attack.
The solution isn’t to try harder or to fix yourself. It’s to recognize the positive intentions of even your “worst” parts, integrate them, and lead them. It’s easier said than done, but nothing gives you a deeper sense of fulfillment in every aspect of your life.
If you feel like you’re broken or something’s missing, listen now.
Show Highlights Include:
- Why most high achievers develop a split personality that quietly leads to burnout, angst, and depression (2:10)
- How to interpret the positive intentions of your “problematic” parts like the people pleaser, the critic, and the procrastinator (4:12)
- How to make your relationships feel safer, your work feel more meaningful, and to better handle stress when it attacks by refusing to war against yourself (4:50)
- The “GROW” secret for becoming the most clear, calm, and confident version of yourself possible (5:53)
- The insidious “P-word” that slowly creeps into your emotional world, filling you with an overwhelming sense of numbness and disconnection (8:52)
- Why your ability to solve problems leaves you emotionally bankrupt (and how to become comfortable “sitting” with problems instead of rushing to solve them) (11:17)
For more about David Tian, go here:
https://www.davidtianphd.com/about/
Want more success in leadership, deeper connections, or a greater sense of fulfillment? Take this free assessment—it’s fast, easy, and tailored to your unique situation. Answer a few simple questions, and you’ll get instant access to a suite of masterclasses designed specifically for where you are right now. Whether you’re struggling or simply want more out of life, this is your next step. No guesswork. Just clarity. Click here and see what’s waiting for you:
Emotional Mastery is David Tian's step-by-step system to transform, regulate, and control your emotions... so that you can master yourself, your interactions with others, and your relationships... and live a life worth living. Learn more here:
153 episodes
Manage episode 491086504 series 2933996
The trickiest part about healing your inner world is learning to figure out the difference between self-help schticks and true healing. They are often confused with each other - especially by high achievers.
And the cost you pay for mixing them up is hefty.
Like, for example:
* Striving for more and more success even when it feels empty
* Sabotaging your relationships at home and at work
* Developing a severe case of burnout, numbness, and depression
And worst of all:
* Tricking yourself into thinking you’re growing when you’re really building more emotional armor that will forever keep deep fulfillment from your grasp.
Here’s the truth: More productivity hacks, more pressure, and more control won’t help you integrate. It’s a form of suffocation for parts you label as bad or weak or needy. But they don’t disappear, they wait until you're at your most vulnerable, then they attack.
The solution isn’t to try harder or to fix yourself. It’s to recognize the positive intentions of even your “worst” parts, integrate them, and lead them. It’s easier said than done, but nothing gives you a deeper sense of fulfillment in every aspect of your life.
If you feel like you’re broken or something’s missing, listen now.
Show Highlights Include:
- Why most high achievers develop a split personality that quietly leads to burnout, angst, and depression (2:10)
- How to interpret the positive intentions of your “problematic” parts like the people pleaser, the critic, and the procrastinator (4:12)
- How to make your relationships feel safer, your work feel more meaningful, and to better handle stress when it attacks by refusing to war against yourself (4:50)
- The “GROW” secret for becoming the most clear, calm, and confident version of yourself possible (5:53)
- The insidious “P-word” that slowly creeps into your emotional world, filling you with an overwhelming sense of numbness and disconnection (8:52)
- Why your ability to solve problems leaves you emotionally bankrupt (and how to become comfortable “sitting” with problems instead of rushing to solve them) (11:17)
For more about David Tian, go here:
https://www.davidtianphd.com/about/
Want more success in leadership, deeper connections, or a greater sense of fulfillment? Take this free assessment—it’s fast, easy, and tailored to your unique situation. Answer a few simple questions, and you’ll get instant access to a suite of masterclasses designed specifically for where you are right now. Whether you’re struggling or simply want more out of life, this is your next step. No guesswork. Just clarity. Click here and see what’s waiting for you:
Emotional Mastery is David Tian's step-by-step system to transform, regulate, and control your emotions... so that you can master yourself, your interactions with others, and your relationships... and live a life worth living. Learn more here:
153 episodes
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