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What happens when Disney Imagineers lose their minds completely? We explore this hilarious premise while enjoying a dangerously delicious Jungle Bird cocktail from Skipper Canteen. This rum and pineapple concoction ($15.50) proves to be the perfect companion as we dive into creating the most absurd, impractical, and downright terrible Disney park additions imaginable.
Our comedic journey takes us through attractions like Hannah Montana's Wrecking Ball ride, where guests swing on actual wrecking balls to the infamous song, and a Walk-Through Flea Farm at Animal Kingdom with real fleas and the potential for itchy souvenirs. We design the ultimate anti-attraction with our Waiting in Line Adventure – a three-hour queue that ultimately leads to a closed ride, perfectly capturing every Disney fan's worst nightmare.
From the boring political debates of our Jedi Council Ride to Goofy's How-To Do Laundry experience (where guests actually wash cast member uniforms), our terrible ideas span every Disney park. We imagine the perfect waste of time with Test Track Traffic Stop, where the ride moves just ten feet before stopping in traffic for ten minutes, and a Parent Trap Mega Ferris Wheel featuring arguing parents who reconcile as "Let's Get Together" blares at painful volumes.
The absurdity continues with unconventional shopping experiences like Duke Wessleton's Toupee and Uniform Ye Olde Shoppe and a Lost and Found Emporium selling items abandoned by previous guests. We even propose a Yemen Pavilion at EPCOT and a Therapy Carousel of Progress showcasing dysfunctional family therapy throughout the decades.
Whether you're a Disney fan looking for a good laugh or someone who enjoys creative satire of theme park experiences, this episode offers a thoroughly entertaining journey through attractions that would make even the most desperate parent flee the parks. Which of our terrible ideas would you avoid at all costs?

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