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In this episode of Dads in Autismland, host Mark de Grasse sits down with entrepreneur and father of six Jason Vance, whose 21-year-old son is on the autism spectrum.
Jason shares the deeply personal and practical journey of raising a child initially diagnosed as moderately to severely autistic—who now lives independently with his grandparents and contributes daily to their small farm.
They discuss parenting philosophies, managing family dynamics with five daughters, the importance of prioritizing marriage amidst challenges, and the power of maintaining long-term dreams even when life detours.
Jason’s core belief in “raising healthy adults” shapes his family’s values and resilience. From teaching life skills to coping with public meltdowns, this episode offers insight, relatability, and inspiration for autism dads everywhere.
TOPICS
- Transitioning from diagnosis to independence in autism parenting
- The philosophy of “raising healthy adults” despite special needs
- Balancing the demands of a large family with a child on the spectrum
- Coping with public meltdowns, social judgment, and shifting expectations
- Prioritizing marriage and long-term dreams as the foundation for family resilience
- The emotional journey of mourning “normal” and embracing a new reality
- Jason’s practical tips for building independence in autistic children
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QUOTES
"Our underlying philosophy sort of goal for the kids is raising healthy adults."
"We just always believed for more, right? That he could have a normal life."
"You have to mourn normal."
"We literally cooked a separate meal for him every day for his entire life."
"It was really hard letting him go. It's like, yes, you're 21, but you're probably 11 or 12 as far as like, you know, your ability and your mind."
ℹ️ Note: Every autistic person's journey is unique. This video shares one family's experience of finding success through focusing on interests and abilities rather than limitations. Always consult with appropriate professionals when developing employment plans.

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