Welcome to the vortex of Jon and Dave, where the fellas discuss the profound struggles of the middle-aged musician—a job akin to being a 60-year-old accountant desperately trying to invent a new Greek number! They dive into the logistics of hosting a terrifying 100-kid Halloween rager that thankfully "backed down" from a midnight curfew to 11 PM.

Hear about the genuine fear of losing a child in a "nanosecond" at College Gameday, and the proud father who risked his life on a step ladder to hang up black lights. Find out if the plan to sell sweatshirts to the seventh-grade crowd was a "quick shipment" success. Plus, one host finally achieves the ultimate parenting victory: sleeping an unbelievable 11 hours and 50 minutes, a feat not accomplished since infancy. Finally, we tackle the burning regional question: Do you call it Thanksgiving, or The Thanksgiving? Hint: we don't know either.

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