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This week on Dam Internet, You Scary!, Tahir is joined by comedian, actor, writer, and content creator ⁨@MrJayWashington⁩ this episode… man. It starts wild and somehow gets wilder.
We cover everything from Instagram ruining society, Pizza Hut nostalgia, knighted penguins, dolphins with boundary issues, a man who sleeps 300 days a year, a nurse who “lightened his workload” the worst way possible, porn logic, relationship hypotheticals, and the most unhinged analogies you’ll hear all week.
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0:00 – Welcome Back + Immediate Chaos
0:51 – Freeballing & Bathroom Podcasting
4:27 – Career Blessings & Christmas Movie
5:05 – Christmas Porn Joke Derailment
6:01 – “Stop One Invention?” → Instagram
8:25 – Food Reviewers & Shucking/Jiving Talk
9:04 – Terry Crews / Fitness Joke
10:33 – Black vs White Porn Titles
10:56 – MAS*H “Spear Chucker Jones” Discovery
12:04 – FACTOR Ad Read
15:20 – Bruce/Caitlyn Transition Joke
16:34 – Instagram’s Evolution to Insanity
18:23 – Twerking Distractions & Discipline
19:27 – Twitter Porn Algorithms
20:35 – Pizza Hut Nostalgia
23:13 – Beaded Curtain Video Store Era
24:05 – Porn Names & Credit Roll Joke
25:26 – Storyline Porn Rant
25:47 – POV Porn… with a Condom
26:16 – “Realistic Porn” Requirements
28:29 – Meta Glasses VR Porn Debate
30:23 – Knighted Penguin Story
31:52 – Brigadier Penguin Explained
32:22 – Dolphins Are Menaces
33:13 – Dolphin Brain Visual
34:01 – Woman in Love with Dolphin Story
35:21 – Woman Who Married a Ferris Wheel
36:29 – IN THE CLOUD Ad Read
39:57 – God Talking at 3AM
40:57 – Negotiating With Noah for Ark Admission
42:22 – Hollywood: Talent vs Value
43:43 – Sugar Baby Logic
45:09 – Sugar Mama Age Limit (83)
46:13 – Slavery Draft Pick Bit
47:18 – German Nurse Who Killed 10 Patients
50:10 – “Lightening the Workload” Breakdown
51:12 – Nursing Home Bed Turnover Reality
53:22 – Uncle Remus vs Harold’s (Chicago Debate)
54:08 – GLD Ad Read
58:42 – Jesus, Mary, Joseph & Theories
1:00:02 – Did Joseph Smash? + Jesus’ Brother James
1:01:18 – Superhead vs Mary Magdalene
1:03:09 – Trailer Park Fight League
1:04:13 – Man Who Sleeps 300 Days a Year
1:05:35 – Could You Care for Someone Like That?
1:06:19 – Partner With No Limbs Hypothetical
1:07:09 – Airline Carry-On Problem
1:08:18 – Box, Packing Peanuts, iPad Playlist
1:09:36 – Playlist for Limbless Bae
1:10:29 – CASH APP Ad Read
1:11:45 – AI Version of Tahir
1:12:20 – Losing Voice & Voice Filters
1:13:14 – Bigfoot Joke + Kids Don’t Watch Dad
1:14:15 – Reverse Cowgirl… Solo Edition
1:15:19 – Dry Jacking vs Lotion Debate
1:16:11 – Jacking Off Using Imagination?!
1:17:05 – Porn Volume vs Neighbors
1:18:32 – Interracial Line Joke
1:18:52 – Hippie’s Editing Hell
1:19:17 – Jay’s Outro + Links