Have you ever lashed out in frustration after relentless emotional torment, only to be told you are the problem? That is reactive abuse, and it is not the same as the calculated, intentional cruelty of narcissistic abuse. They push you until you break—then call you the abuser.

In this episode of Fake Love and Flying Monkeys, we expose how narcissists provoke emotional reactions and then twist reality to shift blame onto you.
"They create chaos, then play the victim."

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Narcissists know exactly how to push your buttons, using manipulation and gaslighting to trigger an outburst. Once they get a reaction, they weaponise it—telling others you are unstable, you are the abuser. It is a classic blame-shifting strategy designed to discredit you and keep you trapped in self-doubt and shame.
We break down:
What reactive abuse really is—and why it is not actual abuse
Why narcissists provoke reactions—and how they use your response against you
How to break free from their manipulation—so you stop playing their game
Overcoming self-blame—so you can reclaim your truth and heal
Losing control after endless provocation does not make you the abuser.
If you have ever questioned yourself after a toxic argument, this episode will give you clarity, validation, and strategies to stay in control.
For more insights and strategies to break free from toxic relationships, grab a copy of my book, Fake Love.

Order my book Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from Narcissistic Abuse here

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Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx