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In this week’s episode, we are diving deep into a relationship pattern so many brilliant, capable, beautiful women find themselves stuck in: the magnetic pull toward the emotionally unavailable man.
If you’ve ever chased crumbs, waited for the 2am “u up?” text, or convinced yourself that bare-minimum effort was “just his way,” this episode is going to land for you.
I unpack why this pattern is so common — and spoiler, it’s not because you’re broken. It’s because your attachment style, childhood wiring, and self-worth have been running the show from the shadows.
In This Episode We Explore:
✨ Why unavailable men feel so intoxicating when you have low self-worth
✨ The anxious–avoidant trap
✨ How childhood bonds create adult relationship choices
✨ What self-worth actually is
✨ What you tolerate when your self-worth is low
✨ How to start breaking the cycle
Practical, grounded, and spiritual tools including:
- Recognising your patterns
- Attachment style awareness
- Shamanic journey work + ancestral healing
- Family constellations
- Nervous system regulation
- Inner child re-parenting
- Learning to trust your intuition (not your anxiety)
- Getting honest about loneliness and choosing from clarity, not fear
✨ Why secure self-worth makes you magnetic
When you choose yourself — truly — your standards rise, your intuition sharpens, and you stop accepting anything that drains your energy or diminishes your value.
If You're Caught in the Cycle…
Please know this: you can break it. You deserve more. And you are not alone.
You get to choose a partner who shows up with consistency, safety, emotional maturity, and respect. You don’t have to earn love. You don’t have to soften parts of yourself to be acceptable. And you do not have to wait for someone to “finally choose you.”
When your self-worth rises, the whole landscape of dating and relationships shifts — for good.
Links & Next Steps:
📌 Listen to Episode 14 for a deeper dive into attachment styles
📌 Next week’s episode features a guest expert on anxious attachment
📌 Come say hello on Instagram: @EmmaOBrienCoach
If this episode has hit home and you recognise your own patterns in the stories I’ve shared, I’d love to support you.
We’ll talk about your self-worth, the unavailable man cycle, and what it will take for you to finally break it — so you can create the love, safety, and connection you truly deserve.
✨ Book a free connection call in HERE
If you’re done playing small and ready to lead yourself — you’re in the right place.

I’m Emma O’Brien — Martha Beck trained and certified life coach, HeartMath practitioner, and shamanic healer helping high-achieving women stop second-guessing themselves and finally trust their own voice.

Through nervous system re-calibration, strategic coaching, and deep energetic work, I help you move from self-doubt to self-trust so you can create a life you actually want to be in — no external approval required.

🌀 Want to work together?

Explore the 6-week Nervous System Reset, 1:1 coaching, or Shamanic Soul Retrieval sessions here: emmaobriencoach.com
Questions or ready to chat?

DM me on Instagram @emmaobriencoach
or book a free connection call HERE.