This week on Meet in the Middle, chaos bubbles to the surface. In Have You Heard, Jake dives into the bizarre world of celebrity hygiene as Sydney Sweeney releases limited-edition soap made from her actual bathwater. Naturally, this sparks a debate about influencer branding, candle-based trauma and how many armpits it takes to ruin a bar of soap.

Danny brings What the FAQ, teaching the gang what it means to “groak”—aka loiter for food without asking. Snack stealing, chip hovering and dinner-guest guilt all get dragged into the spotlight.

Over in Agony Aunt, Rachel handles some peak dating disasters including Davier the Liar, a man who faked being French using Google Translate and croissants, and a romantic date that goes off the rails thanks to a missing hamster and one very unfortunate vomit.

Confessionals delivers chaos on a different level—from a flirtation that ends in a cousin encounter, to a pub quiz fart so loud it echoed off the walls, and a compliment that took an awkward turn when someone mistook a woman’s ring for… well, her bumhole. It’s classic Meet in the Middle carnage—and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

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