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HBO and The Ringer's Bill Simmons hosts the most downloaded sports podcast of all time, with a rotating crew of celebrities, athletes, and media staples, as well as mainstays like Cousin Sal, Joe House, and a slew of other friends and family members who always happen to be suspiciously available.
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What if your greatest traits—the things you’ve always prided yourself on and been recognized for—are actually survival responses your nervous system took on from complex trauma as a child? In this extremely personal and vulnerable episode, I share my eye-opening realization that the perfectionism, people pleasing, and high achievement behind all my “success” in life really stem from deep wounds I’m now working to heal.
As hard as this is to put out there, I see more and more women wrestling as I do—especially once you reach perimenopause and can no longer perform up to your old standards. This episode introduces a variety of themes I’ll expand on greatly moving forward: complex trauma, protective adaptations, hypervigilance, high functioning anxiety, and more.
BY THE TIME YOU FINISH LISTENING, YOU'LL DISCOVER:
- How every time I thought I found a solution to life’s challenges, it turned out that there was a bigger, deeper layer going on beneath the surface
- Why trying to ignore or erase the wounded parts of you only backfires, and why it’s crucial to honor your many parts while minimizing the one(s) that no longer serve you
- The huge, huge tradeoff between being needed and honoring your own needs—and what that means for women like me who unknowingly defined themselves and their life’s purpose around fulfilling everyone else’s needs at the expense of your own
- How, sadly, awareness of your wounds and issues is not the same as actually healing from them
- How the metaphor of “molting” offers a comforting perspective shift in the midst of a painful healing journey
HOMEWORK:
Your homework for today is to email me or DM me on Instagram @solutionsforsimplicity to let me know if this episode resonated with you. Do you wrestle with perfectionism? People pleasing? High achievement? High-functioning anxiety? Martyr mentality? Would love to connect further!
COMING UP NEXT:
Join me back next episode where I interview renowned psychologist, Dr. Hayden Finch, on procrastination and high-functioning anxiety.
CONNECT WITH AMBER: Website | Instagram | YouTube | LinkedIn
Ready to finally get to the root of your problems and change your life FOR GOOD? Book your free 60-minute consult to learn more about working 1:1 with Dr. Amber.
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