Letting Go of Ego and Embracing Coaching in Mortgage Leadership
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Welcome back to Lending Leadership: The Mortgage Pros, where we share real talk and actionable insights for mortgage professionals, from originators just starting out to established leaders looking to sharpen their edge.
In today’s episode, we’re shifting gears from the technical, loan-specific questions we tackled last week and diving deep into something even more foundational: the importance of leadership and coaching in the mortgage business.
We dig into tricky questions about ego, mindset, setting boundaries, the fear of both failure and success, and knowing when—and how—to seek out coaching. This isn’t a polished, scripted Q&A: we haven’t seen these questions ahead of time, so what you’re hearing are our genuine, from-the-heart insights, mixed with a little bit of humor and plenty of real-world perspective from our own experiences as mortgage leaders.
Whether you’re struggling with self-sabotage as your momentum grows, wondering if you really need a coach or just better time management, or feeling shaky after a slow year, we’ve got you covered with candid advice that pulls from both personal stories and industry observations.
Key takeaways:
- Coaching is Not About Being Told What To Do—It’s About Growth: We challenge the idea that being coached means simply following orders. Instead, we see coaching as a co-pilot role, much like the pilot and co-pilot dynamic in aviation—someone there to help you operate at your highest level, catch blind spots, and elevate your performance. Even “the goats” (Tom Brady, Michael Jordan) have coaches.
- Ego Can Cap Your Success (and Everyone Needs a Coach): No matter how successful you are, ego can put a ceiling on your growth. We share personal stories about letting go of “I’ve got this” mentalities and embracing guidance. The mortgage world doesn’t require the years of formal education other high-income fields demand, so continuous learning and coaching are key to building excellence and longevity.
- Boundaries and Coaching Go Hand in Hand: The mortgage industry will take as much as you’re willing to give. Setting healthy boundaries isn’t just about protecting your time—it’s about making your success sustainable. A good coach (not just a paid professional, but anyone who can provide accountability) helps reinforce and uphold those boundaries, so you can operate effectively without burning out.
- Overcoming Fear of Success and Self-Sabotage: Success can be just as scary as failure, leading some to unintentionally hold themselves back. The solution often lies in understanding your worth, clarifying your “why,” and being unapologetic in pursuing your goals. When guilt or discomfort around success arises, channel it into service or giving back—but don’t let it dim your drive.
- Build Confidence By Controlling the Controllables—and Start Small: When business is slow, confidence can tank. The answer isn’t to obsess over your numbers, but to zero in on daily disciplines and small wins: making your calls, writing thank you notes, committing to simple, actionable promises to yourself. Trust is built through consistency in these routines, and confidence naturally follows as you see progress.
Whether you’re considering if you really need a coach, fighting to maintain balance, or simply wanting to level up your mortgage career, we hope today’s episode inspires you to reframe coaching, invest in yourself, and build habits that set you up for success—both personally and professionally.
Don’t forget to send us your questions for upcoming episodes, leave a five-star review, and subscribe so you never miss an episode. Until next time, keep leading—we’re in this together!
Robert, Tom, & Dave
36 episodes