As a couples therapist, Sahaj Kaur Kohli talks about sex all the time with clients. But the truth is, she still struggles to talk about it in her own life. Sahaj and many other children of immigrants grew up with silence, shame, and secrecy around sex and desire. In this episode, Sahaj explores the cultural narratives that shape pleasure and sexuality with kink-affirming, anti-oppressive therapist Kimmy Wu. Listeners also share personal stories of shame and self-discovery in their sex lives. Together, Sahaj and Kimmy offer insights and tips for feeling more liberated in your body, decolonizing your relationship with pleasure, and reclaiming sexual agency on your own terms.

Find exclusive bonus content and continue the conversation with others on Sahaj Kaur Kohli’s Substack, Culturally Enough.

Sahaj Kaur Kohli is the host and creator of this series. Chrystal Genesis is our Executive Producer and Creative Director. Tess Novotny is our lead producer. Music and Audio Engineering by 4S Studios.

For more information, show notes, and resources, visit sahajkaurkohli.com/podcast.

Follow Brown Girl Therapy on Instagram at @browngirltherapy.

So We’ve Been Told is a bold take on wellness, love, and family by sharing what it means to live between cultures. In a new eight-part series, award-winning therapist Sahaj Kaur Kohli breaks down the stories we’ve been told about bicultural identity, relationships and mental health. Featuring real talk, practical advice, expert wisdom and stories from her 250,000-strong community, Brown Girl Therapy, Sahaj helps you understand your past and unpack the present so you can thrive on your own terms.

The eight episodes will explore: living a double life between cultures, family secrets, intercultural relationships, narcissism in immigrant families, duty as a form of love – and control, estrangement, boundary setting with immigrant parents, immigrant guilt, and sex.

This show is for anyone who lives between cultures – or anyone who loves, works with, or knows someone who does (hint: you!).