In this episode, Chris and Alisa Grace explore the complex and often misunderstood topic of expectations in marital intimacy. They welcome special guests Shaunti Feldhahn, an award-winning author and social researcher, and Brian Goins, Senior Director of Strategic Projects at FamilyLife. Together, they delve into the dynamics of initiating and receptive desire, the impact of communication, and practical ways couples can foster understanding and intimacy.
Key Discussion Points:

• The common question of "how often?" and why there's no universal answer.
• The importance of understanding different desire types: initiating, receptive, and resistant.
• How unspoken expectations and lack of communication can lead to frustration and disappointment.
• Practical advice for navigating differences in desire and building stronger connections through communication and empathy.
• Insights from Shaunti and Brian's work, including data-driven strategies for healthy conversations about intimacy.

Resources Mentioned:

• "Secrets of Sex & Marriage" by Shaunti Feldhahn and Dr. Michael Sytsma – A book offering eight surprising insights to improve marital intimacy. Learn more and purchase.
• Married with Benefits Podcast – Discussions on intimacy, communication, and expectations in marriage. Listen here.
• FamilyLife’s Instagram – instagram.com/familylifeinsta.
• Shaunti Feldhahn’s Instagram – instagram.com/shauntifeldhahn.
• Axis.org – Tools and resources for parents to have conversations about technology, relationships, and more. Visit Axis.

Connect with Us:

• Website: cmr.biola.edu
• Facebook: facebook.com/biolacmr
• Instagram: instagram.com/biolacmr
• YouTube: youtube.com/@biola-cmr

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About the Hosts:

Chris Grace, Ph.D., and Alisa Grace are passionate about helping people build and sustain healthy relationships. As leaders of the Biola University Center for Marriage and Relationships, they combine the wisdom of Scripture with scholarly research to offer practical advice and insights. Learn more about their work at cmr.biola.edu.