In this powerful and intimate episode Ruthie Ackerman, acclaimed journalist and author of The Mother Code, a memoir that explores identity, generational trauma, and what it means to mother, and be mothered, Ruthie and I dive deep into the complexities of navigating partnerships that do and do not support having children, reclaiming one's narrative, especially as an adoptee and a woman navigating the emotional legacy of invisible wounds. With compassion and clarity, Ruthie shares her journey of unraveling the inherited and intergenerational trauma, motherhood ambivalence, what to do when our partners do not want children but maybe we do but don’t want to lose our partnership or compromise our desires. Ruthie gives name to the quiet grief that shaped her sense of self. She discusses the concept of “the mother code”— the unconscious beliefs and expectations passed down through maternal line —and how we can become conscious authors of our own mothering experience, whether we have children or not. Ruthie discusses how writing, creativity, and community are the path of emotional healing, personal transformation and creating whatever it is we chose to birth into the world. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of healing, the power of truth-telling, and the courage it takes to rewrite the codes we’ve lived by. If you've ever questioned your origin story, your role in your family, or how to break generational patterns, this conversation will resonate deeply. Our Guest: Ruthie Ackerman Website: https://www.ruthieackerman.com/ Instagram: @ruackerman Preorder your book now and receive a spot in Ruthie’s free “Write Your Mother Code Story” to receive her Masterclass on May 5, 2025, through this link: https://form.jotform.com/250406647752156 About Gwen: Website: https://www.gwendittmar.com Instagram: @gwendittmar Gwen's Grounded Group starts May 8th - A 6-week nervous system + neuroscience, somatic and spiritual reset for success (includes Safe and Sound Protocol by PolyVagal Institute, Limbic Retraining, Somatic Medicine, Breathwork and Spiritual tools to get grounded). Ideal for overwhelm, stress, anxiety, wealth and health issues, and midlife. Sliding scale, virtual, recorded classes. Join through www.gwendittmar.com/grounded-group