It's time to get feckless in Texas, at a strange simian start-up built by the muskrat himself. Why are those apes serving beverages to their human guests? And how will they serenade the tea party? All gets revealed in another awful edition of this sketch comedy podcast. But it's no ordinary episode. This is the Season Finale of Series One and, boy, do they milk that one. From the American Southwest we head to the great Jarndyce Booksellers, opposite the British Museum, for a slice of music hall nonsense. Susie in the Shoeshine Shop, no less. But there's no time to shudder. We're back on the beach for those barnacled boulevardiers - the Great Crustaceans - who are airing some musical differences. Will Squid Vicious get his free jazz masterpiece onto the new band release? Dream on, Squid. It only remains for West Country windbag Denzel Rumpo to try appeasing his errant spouse with some John Prine lyrics. Dream on, Denzel. Today's sponsor is Twinkle, a memory-aide which harnesses the power of ancient Peruvian tree bark, 'stripped by actual shamans'. And our previous sponsor was a catheter corporation. Makes you wonder what demographic the show's advertisers are targeting...

With thanks to Mike Hebbert on concertina, Dorian Ford on piano, and the great Irish storyteller Jack Lynch for his inspiration. We should also thank the assembler of this absurdity, Mr Matthew Crampton, but he's already off scouting nonsense for Series Two.

Don't forget to send in your suggestions for the letter W. Oh and if you like the show, do get in touch. Podcastville can be a quiet place.

More about Mr Crampton at matthewcrampton.com.

Mad Chimpanzees.mp3 by allornothing21 -- https://freesound.org/s/235234/ -- License: Attribution 4.0

manual typewriter by theshaggyfreak -- https://freesound.org/s/118591/ -- License: Attribution 4.0

Pouring tea by MrAuralization -- https://freesound.org/s/324937/ -- License: Attribution 4.0

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