In this deeply human episode of Giving Voice to Depression, John, a survivor of a suicide attempt, shares his ongoing struggle with self-forgiveness — and what healing looks like when you’re still learning to forgive yourself.

While many conversations about suicide focus on grief or prevention, John opens up about what comes after survival: the guilt, shame, and lingering belief that he doesn’t deserve forgiveness. Despite being forgiven by his family, including his son, John continues to wrestle with self-compassion and self-worth.

Through an honest and courageous conversation with hosts Terry McGuire and Bridget, John explores what it means to recover emotionally and spiritually — even when the process is slow, imperfect, and deeply personal.

This episode sheds light on the emotional aftermath of suicide attempts and offers gentle encouragement to anyone navigating their own healing: you are not alone, and forgiveness is possible — even if it hasn’t happened yet.

Primary Topics Covered:

• The emotional aftermath of surviving a suicide attempt
• Why forgiving yourself can be harder than forgiving others
• Guilt, shame, and self-loathing in recovery
• How family support can begin the healing process
• Developing self-compassion through therapy and meditation
• Understanding that recovery isn’t linear — and that “not yet” is still progress
• Practical insights on living with ongoing suicidal thoughts
• The importance of honest, stigma-free conversations about mental health

Timestamps:

00:00 – Introduction to the episode and hosts
02:13 – John’s story: surviving a suicide attempt and learning to forgive himself
03:06 – Why stories about self-forgiveness after a suicide attempt are rare
04:02 – Guilt, self-loathing, and loss of self-worth
05:14 – How John’s son forgave him — instantly and unconditionally
06:03 – Why self-forgiveness feels harder than accepting forgiveness from others
06:49 – Living with lingering feelings of unworthiness
07:36 – How therapy and psychiatry help manage suicidal thoughts
08:34 – Searching for the “magic tool” for self-compassion
09:13 – Meditation and its role in emotional healing
09:46 – Guilt, shame, and letting go — why all are connected
10:55 – Advice to other suicide attempt survivors: don’t let guilt derail recovery
12:43 – Accepting that forgiveness takes time — and that “not yet” is okay
13:25 – The power of reframing self-talk
14:00 – Learning by speaking: how sharing stories helps healing
15:19 – From self-loathing to self-acceptance: small language shifts that matter
16:28 – The chemistry of self-talk and why kindness changes your brain
17:39 – Closing reflections and resources for self-forgiveness and support

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