Down But Never Out: A Journey Through Trauma, Growth, and Human Connection with Amber Fuhriman
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Amber Fuhriman: Success Architect, Author, Speaker, Attorney
- Website: successdevelopmentsolutions.com
- Social Media: @AmberrayFuhriman (all platforms)
- Podcast: Break Your Bullshit Box
Episode Highlights
The Netflix Special Question (1:00) Amber opens up about her challenging year, describing it as "Down But Never Out" - a raw look at overcoming trauma while maintaining resilience.
The Shooting Incident & PTSD Journey (2:18)
- Experiencing a shooting at an event one year ago
- The unexpected onset of PTSD symptoms
- How trauma shifted her perspective on victims and defense work
- The identity crisis that followed losing her ability to "find good in people"
The Art of Being Present (8:12)
- Why saying "I know exactly how you feel" destroys credibility
- Creating safe spaces for people to "not be okay"
- The importance of asking: "Do you want a friend, a solution, or just someone to listen?"
Intention Behind Communication (14:30)
- Before speaking, ask: "What is the purpose of this statement?"
- Is it to make you feel better or actually help them?
- Personal example: Dating after abandonment trauma and checking motivations before reaching out
The Power of Vulnerability (18:30)
- "True growth comes when we stop trying to hide our insecurities through behavior that society has told us is okay"
- Being honest about needs instead of disguising them in "acceptable" behavior
- The cycle of vulnerability, potential rejection, and sitting in discomfort
Feelings Are Choices (25:00)
- "Their actions are all about them, and your response to their actions is all about you"
- The difference between warranted and unwarranted emotional responses
- "Choice is a powerful thing, and suffering is always optional"
Reframing Grief (25:50)
- Grief can be experienced with sadness OR with joy, gratitude, and acceptance
- Stephen Colbert quote: "The things I'm most grateful for are the things that caused me the most pain"
- "I prayed for flowers so I can't be upset that the rain came first"
Current Work & Projects
NLP Coaching & Speaking
- Neurolinguistic Programming for business success
- Focus on sales, communication, and leadership blocks
- In-person networking in Vegas, speaking engagements nationally/internationally
Upcoming Project: "Life Lessons: What My German Shepherd Taught Me About Play, Purpose and Perspective"
- Book, calendar, and workbook inspired by her 5-year-old German Shepherd Jasmine
- Each chapter structured as dog commands (example: goal-setting chapter called "Fetch")
- Exploring what life would be like if we approached business and relationships from a dog's perspective
Key Takeaways
- Accept Where You Are: "Wherever you are in your journey right now is exactly where you're supposed to be"
- The GPS Analogy: You can't get where you want to go if you pretend you're starting from somewhere else
- Sit in Discomfort: Growth requires sitting in uncomfortable feelings rather than trying to fix them immediately
- Check Your Intentions: Before offering advice or solutions, examine whether you're trying to help them or make yourself feel better
- Create Safe Spaces: Sometimes the most powerful thing you can offer is a place where someone ca
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