S3 - EP13 - Adriana De Jesus : When Asthma Turns Fatal: A Story of Unexpected Loss
Widowed AF: Real stories of love, grief and beyond - With Rosie Gill-Moss
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In this episode, Rosie Gill-Moss speaks with Adriana De Jesus, a young widow from New York state who lost her husband Jason to a fatal asthma attack when their son was just 14 months old. This powerful conversation explores the devastating reality of sudden widowhood, the challenges of single parenting after loss, and the unexpected journey of finding meaning through grief.
Adriana shares her love story with Jason, beginning at a soundstage studio in 2018 where their 15-year age gap didn't prevent an instant connection. Their relationship accelerated during the 2020 lockdown, leading to parenthood and what seemed like a bright future together. However, in June 2023, Jason's routine seasonal asthma took a fatal turn, possibly exacerbated by poor air quality from Canadian wildfires. Despite having managed his condition his entire life, Jason died from an asthma attack at home, leaving Adriana to navigate sudden widowhood at just 28 years old.
The conversation delves into the immediate aftermath of loss, including the trauma of performing CPR, arriving at the hospital with her infant son, and learning her partner hadn't survived. Adriana candidly discusses the guilt she felt about finally getting sleep after months of exhaustion with a newborn, only to lose Jason just as life was settling into a rhythm. She reveals the financial and legal complications of being engaged but not married in New York state, where common law marriages aren't recognised, creating additional stress during an already overwhelming time.
What makes this episode particularly valuable is Adriana's honest exploration of grief's complexities. She discusses discovering both her and Jason likely had undiagnosed ADHD, which affected their relationship dynamics and her postpartum experience. The episode also touches on her unique healing journey, including her decision to train as a medium after a transformative reading that helped her process Jason's death. This unexpected path has allowed her to support other grieving individuals while maintaining her connection to Jason.
For parents concerned about asthma, Adriana offers perspective on managing fear after loss. When her son Parker was diagnosed with asthma, she drew strength from Jason's attitude about not letting the condition limit his life. She emphasises the importance of proper diagnosis, medication management, and understanding environmental triggers like air quality alerts. Her approach to explaining death to her toddler, teaching him that "Daddy is in our hearts," provides a touching example of age-appropriate grief conversations.
Adriana De Jesus works in the film industry while raising her son Parker in upstate New York. Following Jason's death, she trained as an evidential medium, offering readings professionally alongside her day job. Her story demonstrates how young widows navigate practical challenges like childcare, work-life balance, and financial planning while processing profound grief. She credits finding the Widowed AF podcast with helping her feel less alone in her journey, highlighting the importance of community and shared experiences in healing from loss.
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