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HBO and The Ringer's Bill Simmons hosts the most downloaded sports podcast of all time, with a rotating crew of celebrities, athletes, and media staples, as well as mainstays like Cousin Sal, Joe House, and a slew of other friends and family members who always happen to be suspiciously available.
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In this powerful conversation, Dr. Amelia Kelley welcomes back psychotherapist and author Jessica Baum to discuss her newest book, Safe: An Attachment-Informed Guide to Building Secure Relationships.
Jessica, known for her best-selling book Anxiously Attached, dives deeper into attachment theory, exploring how our early experiences shape our nervous systems, relationship patterns, and sense of safety.
Together, Amelia and Jessica unpack the wheel of attachment, discuss how attachment styles can shift in different relationships, and explore why neglect can be more damaging than abuse. They also talk about how empathy, sensitivity, and trauma intertwine, and what it takes to heal and cultivate secure, fulfilling relationships.
Whether you identify as anxiously attached, avoidant, or disorganized, this episode offers compassionate guidance, science-backed insight, and hope for healing.
Key Takeaways:
- Your attachment style is not fixed, it’s fluid and can change depending on the relationship and your healing journey.
- Neglect can be more damaging than abuse because it creates an internalized fear of nonexistence and disconnect.
- Safety in relationships comes from co-regulation and feeling “with” the other person on a nervous-system level.
- Healing attachment wounds involves understanding your nervous system, self-compassion, and connecting with safe, attuned people.
- Couples can repair anxious-avoidant dynamics through therapy modalities like Imago or Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT).
- Highly sensitive people often developed heightened attunement as a survival mechanism in inconsistent environments.
- Empathy and narcissism both stem from early attachment experiences and whether we were adequately mirrored as children.
- Healing requires both boundaries and compassion, empathy without self-protection leads to burnout and codependency.
Resources & Links
Learn more about Jessica’s book and redeem free incentives: https://www.jessicabaumlmhc.com/interview
Follow Jessica:
Connect with Dr. Amelia Kelley: About | Dr. Kelley's Books | Instagram
Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/the-sensitivity-doctor/exclusive-content
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